


Reconnected

by babytobin_horse



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-26
Updated: 2015-04-03
Packaged: 2018-02-27 01:58:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2674625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babytobin_horse/pseuds/babytobin_horse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tobin's career began in France, but she'll never forget her American roots. Her American roots seemed to almost forget about her - up until Tobin finds herself back on American soil.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Alex chugged the rest of her gatorade, finishing off the blue liquid before tossing the bottle into - well close - to the trash can. “Can you get that for me?” she smiled at her teammate who was walking by, and she giggled as they rolled their eyes but did as they were asked. “Thanks!” she called out, slouching on the bench.

She quickly proceeded to remove her shin guards and cleats, leaving them on the bench as she popped up and jogged over to the stands. A few little girls asked her to sign their balls or flyers and she gladly agreed, but did so with a little urgency. Her eyes were wandering the sidelines until she found player number 98 talking to one of her teammates as they slowly slid their cleats off. Alex laughed at how there was a stain of yellow gatorade on the girl’s jersey.

“Idiot,” she mumbled with a quick shake of her head.

“Hey lover girl, are you going to stop staring? ‘Cause you’re already drooling.”

Alex’s head whipped up to see a freckled face a few feet away from her with a teasing smirk. Although it was a Cal against UNC match, she was donned in a Stanford t-shirt, proudly showing it off on a campus that most likely hated her for it.

The striker flicked the smaller girl’s forehead, sticking her tongue out. “Shut it, Kelley.”

“What?” the other girl asked innocently. “Not my fault you’re going all love eyes on my best friend.”

“She’s my girlfriend and I haven’t seen her in a couple of months,” Alex defended, crossing her arms. “What do you expect?”

“Talking about me?” another voice asked. Their arms suddenly wrapped around Alex from behind and a head rested on her shoulder.

Alex let out a small squeal and turned, hugging the other girl properly. Her arms wrapped around the older girl’s neck and she had such a tight grip that it was as if she wasn’t planning to let go. “I missed you so much,” she mumbled, placing a kiss at the nape of her neck.

“I feel the same way,” the other girl replied, leaving a soft peck in Alex’s hair.

Kelley, meanwhile, rolled her eyes and cleared her throat rather obnoxiously. “Thanks Tobin, I missed you too best friend!”

Tobin pulled away from Alex’s embrace, turning to face the Stanford striker. “Hey Kel. I missed you, how could I not?” she chuckled before turning attention back to Alex. “That was a cheeky goal you had earlier.”

Alex shrugged and shot back with a quirk of an eyebrow, “Nice job nutmegging half my backline.”

“What can I say? I try,” Tobin laughed, wrapping an arm around the younger girl’s shoulder. She looked once again to the girl still in the stands. “Can we go get something to eat? I’m starving.”

Kelley pretended to think about it for a moment before answering, “Only if you two shower.” She wrinkled her nose in mock disgust. “You both smell like shit.”

\--

Alex’s roommate was nowhere to be found that night, and she was glad. She wasn’t sure if it was because she was at a party or had actually remembered Alex’s girlfriend was in town, but either way she was completely okay with it. She’s the Man was playing on the small TV in her dorm and she was snuggled up against Tobin’s side with the older girl’s arm draped lazy around her. There was a bowl of popcorn sitting on Tobin’s stomach and a few bottles of gatorade and water scattered around the room.

She liked moments like this. Though most people would go all out and do something big with a long-distance girlfriend, Alex didn’t mind staying in and watching a movie. Tobin was that type of person, and honestly Alex didn’t have the energy to go do anything after the game and dinner with Kelley. So a night with with an old movie wasn’t bad at all for her.

“Baby, would you ever play overseas?” Tobin asked as she tossed another water bottle to the ground.

“Stop littering my dorm!” the younger girl chastised, poking Tobin’s cheek. “And I don’t know,” she shrugged, turning her cheek to face her. “It would definitely improve my game.”

Tobin thought about it for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” After a moment she asked, “Would you leave college to play overseas?”

A slight frown tugged at Alex’s lips. She propped herself up on her elbows, eyeing Tobin for a good moment. “Where is this going?”

Instead of answering, Tobin looked at Alex with a sweet smile. “Answer the question honestly please?”

Alex let out a long sigh, chewing her bottom lip as she thought about an answer. She ran though a quick impromptu list of the first pros and cons she could think of - twice, actually - before asking, “Would I go off and find a club to play for or would a club offer me money?”

“Offer you money,” Tobin supplied, now propping herself up on one elbow after placing the bowl of popcorn on the bed.

“How much?”

“Five figures.”

At this the striker sat up and crossed her arms, giving a questioning look to Tobin. The movie was long forgotten, as well as the bowl of popcorn in between them. She knew Tobin was one for philosophical and sometimes hypothetical conversations, but this wasn’t about to be one of them. Alex could tell from the tone in Tobin’s voice she was anxious about something and that something had to do with playing overseas.

“Tobin Heath,” she said in a tone that Tobin knew very well she listen to or else she’d possibly die. “What are you getting at, exactly?”

Tobin had a look of hesitation on her face for a moment as if debating whether or not she should tell Alex, but of course her resolve to keep it from her girlfriend crumbled as she sat up with her shoulders slightly slouched. “Um, well...there’s a club in France, and they offered me five figures on my contract to play there.”

Alex’s blue eyes went wide. “That’s amazing!” she exclaims. “For how long?”

“Two years,” Tobin answered, rubbing the back of her neck. “Meaning, I wouldn’t finish college. Not here, at least.”

The Cal striker’s grin faded slowly, looking at Tobin with a resigned expression. “Oh.”

Her girlfriend was apparently offered a five figure contract to play two years across the world. She wasn’t even sure how she could begin to process that. It wasn’t a club close by in the states. No, it was across an ocean, in a completely different time zone and language. It was France.

“Yeah,” the older girl nodded, biting her lip. She let the news sink in for a little before adding, “And there’s something else.”

Alex’s stomach dropped. “What Tobin?” When a few seconds passed without an answer, she pressed again. “Tobin.”

“France’s head coach wants me to train with them for the next friendly. And if things work out...they want me to play for them.”

The younger girl stared at her girlfriend. Her ears were ringing from the bombshell that was currently dropping in her own dorm room. Sure, Tobin’s dad was French after all, but that didn’t mean she was going to end up playing for France. Not to Alex, at least. She assumed Tobin would be playing for the United States with her. They’d make their mark on this country, together.

“Al? Did you hear me?” Tobin asked nervously, giving her girlfriend an apprehensive look.

“Um yeah, It’s just so much to take in.” Alex replied after a moment. “But...France, Tobin? Are you really considering playing for them? What about our national team?”

The midfielder let out a long sigh, running a hand through her hair. “I know. That’s supposed to be my dream, right? But I think for me that’s all it’ll ever be, Lex. I mean...have you seen the national team? Their midfielders..I’m not going to be able to compete with that-”

“Yes you can,” the forward jumped in quickly. “Tobin Heath, never think that you aren’t good enough because you sure as hell are good enough to make the national team. And I’m not saying that as your girlfriend.”

Tobin managed a soft chuckle, but quirks an eyebrow. “So what if I make the national team? Doesn’t mean I’ll actually play. There’s too many people I know in the player pool that would start over me. Alex, France...it’s a growing process over there. I can make it big out there. I can help them get to where they need to be.”  
“But France? That’s a different continent,” Alex stressed, crossing her arms. “That basically means you’re living in France.”

“I...I know,” Tobin admitted, looking away. “I know what it means. I’ve thought about this for two weeks straight.”

The two sat in silence for a moment, the gravity of what Tobin had coming for her really settling in. She was given an opportunity to play overseas - forever - and she was actually thinking about taking it. Alex wanted to be angry with her, but she couldn’t. Of course she couldn’t. This was Tobin’s future she was talking about and of course she wanted success for the midfielder, but she was her girlfriend after all. What did it mean for them?

“How long until you need to make a decision?”

“Two months,” Tobin replied, looking into the blue eyes that were holding too many emotions for her to decipher. “The French have a friendly at the beginning of summer, and they want me on that roster. If I take the deal with the club too, I’ll start in the fall.”

Alex nodded slowly, taking Tobin’s hand into hers. “What do we do, Tobin?”

“I don’t know,” the older girl groaned. “I’m sorry for dumping this on you when I leave tomorrow. I just had to tell you in person and-”

“It’s okay Tobin,” the striker interrupted. It really wasn’t, but she wasn’t in the mood for arguing with her girlfriend that was currently living in North Carolina. “I get it. Just...let this night last a little longer.”

Tobin nodded, giving into Alex’s request. She wrapped her arms around the forward’s center and pulled her closer. “Okay,” she whispered as she looked at Alex for a long time.

Agreeing to France meant leaving Alex. Leaving Alex meant not seeing her much - even less than she did now. It also meant it might even be better to let Alex go. That thought honestly scared Tobin, causing her to tighten her grip on the younger girl, who gave her a strange look but didn’t ask her anything. She simply rested her head on Tobin’s chest and turned her attention back to the movie. Tobin let out a soft sigh, kissing the top of Alex’s head, wishing that there was any other decision she could make that didn’t involve practically starting over in another country.

“Watch the movie,” Alex mumbled from her position, not looking up.

“Fine,” Tobin chuckled softly, turning to face the screen as Amanda Bynes shoved a tampon up her nose.

\--

Yes, Alex and Tobin broke up last week. Yes, Tobin was currently sitting in the airport, waiting for her and her father’s flight to take her to France to possibly start her life there. But Tobin still somewhat expected Alex to come say goodbye. It’s not like they broke up by a nasty fight and screaming match. They had sat down and had a long, long discussion about what was best for them, and more specifically what was best for Tobin. As the conversation continued the dreaded feeling had grown in Tobin’s stomach, signaling that this was it. There were tears and a long hug (and a kiss on the forehead courtesy of Tobin), and then the last words Alex spoke to Tobin.

“Good luck in France.”

It was all that was echoing in Tobin’s head as she anxiously waited for her flight to be called. A part of her wanted Alex to come running in, out of breath with her hair a mess and tell her to stay in California for the rest of the summer, to tell her that they’d get her on the national team with no problem. But it wasn’t going to happen. This wasn’t some stupid romance movie Alex adored. It was real life, and real life was telling her that it was time to go to France because it was the best option.

“Tobin,” her father said, breaking her out of her thoughts. “Come on, we’re boarding.”

“Right,” the midfielder nodded, standing up. She took a quick 360, hoping to catch a brunette frantically searching the area, but when there was none to be found, she slung on her backpack and grabbed everything else she needed, following her dad to the line.

“Au revoir yo,” Tobin muttered somewhat jokingly.

 


	2. One: International

“A very special international!”

It was all Alex has heard from her coach as well as all the staff for the Thorns for the past two weeks. Season was bound to start in a week, and they had one more addition to their team before they were ready to officialize their roster. No one had a clue on who was coming to Portland, which was surprising considering the amount of connections they all had as a collective team in the soccer world. Whoever she was had to be really big if Merritt Paulson refused to say her name.

Was she a forward, a midfielder or a defender? She had to be an attacking player. Paul like attacking...a lot. Also, didn’t Paul let Sinead Farrelly go for this international? Alex’s mind was telling her midfielder was the most obvious answer. Would she know how to feed Alex all the right balls? Would she know how to find her and Sinc the way Vero and Steph learned to? Would she even fit with the style Paul had them play? Well, of course she would. Paul had to have picked her for a reason. Who was this international and what made her so damn special to everyone in the Thorns organization?

“Rise and shine, Alex! We have training in two hours!” her roommate called as she passed by Alex’s bedroom, breaking through the forward’s train of thought.

The striker groaned, stretching her arms over her head before rolling off the bed and onto her feet. She swiped her hair up into a ponytail and managed to get the right clothes on before joining the other woman for breakfast.

“How the hell are you up before me?” Alex asked the blonde who was busy tossing whatever fruits she found in the fridge into the blender.

The older woman pushed a button and began to mix her fruits before turning to Alex. “Not my fault you fell asleep so late.”

Alex gaped. “Allie, you sleep later than I do! Always on twitter,” she scoffed, crossing her arms.

Allie smirked, offering a small shrug. “My internal clock seems to be better than yours then.” She returned her attention the blender and shut it off, pouring the homemade smoothie into two cups and handed one to Alex.

Life in Portland was something Alex had grown used to. She didn’t have her own place there yet, but she was definitely considering calling the city home. California was great, but there was something about Portland that kept her there. It was more than just the fans, the atmosphere and the soccer. It was Portland itself: the quirky city was a place had quickly grown on her the first season she came to the town. She liked living in the apartments with her team during the season, but she kind of wanted more of a reason to be there in the offseason, and somewhere to stay in that time.

“The international’s supposed to come in today,” her roommate said.

The striker took a sip of the smoothie and licked her lips. Blueberry and bananas with a few strawberries. She gave her nod of approval before commenting, “Thank God, I’m so sick of everyone buzzing about it without actually dropping a name.”

“Who do you think it is?” Allie asked curiously, leaning on the counter. “I bet it’s a German.”

“We already have a German,” Alex pointed out. “Think of the countries not in the NWSL. Paul said it was one of those.”

“Hmm,” Allie hummed before gulping down some of her smoothie. “Swedish?”

Alex nodded, Swedish players running through her mind. “Not sure any of them would leave the clubs they’re with though.”

“You never know,” Allie pointed out, quirking her eyebrow.

“I mean we’ll find out in a couple of hours when we show up to training,” Alex supplied, drinking the rest of her smoothie. “It won’t be a secret much longer.”

Maybe Alex should’ve wished that it was indeed kept a secret.

\--

“Good morning ladies!” Mana sang through the locker room as she grabbed her cleats out of her bag.

Alex couldn’t help but laugh, noticing the small hawaiian’s happiness almost immediately. She was always a joy to have on the team, and a very good friend to have around. They’d bonded almost immediately when the NWSL first began - also Mana’s rookie year - and had only grown closer ever since. She watched the younger girl playfully smack Allie for the teasing she’d been getting and smiled. It was a good environment in Portland. She wouldn’t trade it for the world, honestly.

“Has anyone seen the new international?!” someone yelled, trying to get the girls’ attention in the loud locker room as everyone put on their gear.

There were a chorus of “no”s around the room, and some even looked around as if the international player would be in the locker room at that very moment, just listening to their conversation. Alex sighed softly, the thought of the international bothering her again. Who could it possibly be?

“Well whoever it was had to be worth saying goodbye to Sinead,” Steph Catley commented as she finished lacing up her boots. “Paul would’ve never let her go.”

“It doesn’t matter who the new international is,” their captain said abruptly. “As long as she’s good at what she does, we shouldn’t be concerned with her name.” Christine Sinclair looked at her teammates and Alex held the temptation to roll her eyes.

“You’re curious too Sinc don’t lie,” she pointed out with a cock of her hip.

Sinc gave her a smirk. “Exactly. Which is why I’m going out to the field now to see if Paul’s out there with our mysterious international.”

With that, she dashed out of the field, leaving the rest of her team there to laugh and shake their head at their Canadian leader. The rest of the team finished putting on the cleats and started exiting the locker room in groups of two or three. Alex took her time because for some reason, she was growing anxious. She didn’t want to admit it, but it had everything to do with the international. She had a weird feeling about it, and even though she shouldn’t, she still didn’t like where it was headed.

“Come on Alex!” Allie groaned. “You’re taking forever today. That lack of sleep getting to you?” she teased.

The striker rolled her eyes and scoffed. “You just wait till we start sprinting. You got nothing on me Long,” she replied with a smirk as she placed the pink pre-wrap headband on her head. She winked at Allie, then promptly jogged to catch up with Mana. Allie only laughed before catching up with the two of them. The three of them made their way out of the tunnel to join the rest of their teammates at the bench. Alex loved the days they trained at their home field rather than the practice field. It always got her pumped for the next day, making her want to work even harder. She loved being able to know where she was on the field by just simply closing her eyes. Over the years, Providence Park became another home to her. She felt in control on this specific field, more so than anywhere else. She knew the place like the back of her hand, and that’s why she felt her best games for the club were home games.

Alex was absentmindedly walking with the other two girls to the cluster of teammates at the bench quite unaware of what was happening around her. Her thoughts of Providence Park and the memories she made on the pitch were clouding her mind that she wasn’t aware of the foreigner amongst the girls. She turned to say something to Mana - who actually wasn’t even paying any attention whatsoever to Alex - when she heard a laugh. She froze, her mouth half open as the gears in her mind turned. She knew that laugh. It played in the back of her mind again and again. There had to be some mistake; her mind had to be playing tricks on her. There was no possible way she could’ve heard that laugh.

“Well, looks like Sinc likes the newbie already,” Allie commented first. “She looks familiar.”

The blue-eyed striker stilled, knowing very well that the feeling in the pit of her stomach meant something. She took a quick glance at Mana, whose eyes seemed transfixed on the newcomer. Alex slowly turned her head to see for herself. It was a surprise that her jaw didn’t drop straight to the floor. Her mouth dried and she was unable to form a proper sentence. The woman she saw talking to her captain was someone she didn’t think she’d ever see in this environment - or in this country, really.

“Holy shit,” she whispered.

The whisper drew Mana’s attention, causing the smaller one to ask, “Al, what’s wrong?”

Alex couldn’t even answer if she wanted to. Her thoughts were racing and her heart did this weird thing where it began to beat erratically out of tune. Luckily for her, she didn’t have time to think of a plausible response because Paul blew his whistle to call everyone’s attention.

“As most of you know, our last international has arrived today. Some of you have already met her. Since it’s already obvious, here’s our international, French midfielder Tobin Heath.”

The girls all clapped supportively, Alex following suit but she was still dumbfounded. Out of all the possible world class women’s soccer players that Paul could have acquired, he happened to acquire Alex’s ex-girlfriend. Tobin offered a small smile and a lazy wave, in true Tobin fashion. Something about the motion comforted Alex. There still some things in Tobin she could pick out, at least.

“Most of you may already be familiar with her” - if only he really knew - “ but for those of you who aren’t, Tobin was born and raised here in the US, and played two years at North Carolina…”

The striker tuned out Paul’s speech and introduction of Tobin. She knew most of the facts already. She’d seen Tobin play with the national team. She couldn’t say she’d ever played Tobin on the national level because she hadn’t. The only time she’d had the chance of playing France was in the Olympics and Tobin had been injured and out for a year. She didn’t need to play her to know just how much she’d improved (if that was even possible) since moving to France. The real question was: How much about Tobin changed? Did Alex really know her at all anymore?

She’d been so focused on her own thoughts and attempting to avoid looking at Tobin that she didn’t notice until moments later that there was a pair of honey brown eyes that were fixed on her. The hair on her neck and arms prickled, and Alex suddenly felt warm all over. Her jaw tightened as she suddenly felt conscious of every move she made. She lifted her eyes from the cleats on the ground to find the eyes she used to know so well looking right at her. What was more unnerving was that Tobin didn’t bother to look away once eye contact was established. Instead, Tobin held it for a moment longer before a hint of a playful smirk and a slight raise of her eyebrows. It was the ghost of a look that used to drive Alex insane when she was younger. She quietly exhaled, looking away quickly. Tobin had been in Portland for less than a day and she was already getting Alex worked up.

“Are you okay?” Allie whispered, noticing the state Alex was in.

“Fine,” Alex answered through clenched teeth. “I can’t believe this.”  
“Yeah me either,” Allie mused, not picking up on the striker’s mood. “If she hadn’t gone overseas, I would’ve played with her when I transferred.”

Alex resisted the temptation to roll her eyes. Of course Allie was sidetracked by other things. She couldn’t get mad at her roommate though. No one on the team was aware of Alex’s relationship with Tobin. Alex was a freshman in college when it all happened and only talked to a handful of girls at the time that ended up being her teammates on the Thorns.

“So let’s train hard today,” Paul suggested, clapping his hands together at the end of his spiel about Tobin. “Are you ready for this, Tobin?”

Tobin gave him a big smile. “Yeah, I’m ready to see what Rose City’s girls are really made of.”

Her voice sounded the same for the most part, but there was a slight trace of a French accent lingering underneath. It wasn’t very obvious, but it stuck out to Alex. Tobin looked at the others, but her eyes lingered on Alex a moment longer than anyone else.

It was bound to be a long practice.

\--

Every single woman was dripping in sweat by the end of training. The cool April weather wasn’t enough to keep the training at an easy pace. The only thing that kept them going was that it wasn’t a two-a-day, but content of the day’s training surely made up for it. Needless to say, Alex was distracted for majority of practice. She wasn’t fully present for anything she did: her shots were off, her runs were mistimed, her placement was sloppy. Tobin’s presence alone was distracting enough, but to know there was a pair of eyes that would watch her from time to time every few drills was enough to throw the striker off.

“I CALL TAKING AN ICE BATH FIRST!” Courtney Niemiec half-yelled, dropping her cleats and shin guards at her locker and stripping off her training gear as she made the half-hearted attempt to jog to the tub first.

“Same!” Amber called out after, dropping her cleats immediately after she heard Courtney’s dibs.

Alex let out a breathy laugh, rolling her eyes at her younger teammate. She dumped her cleats at the foot of her locker before collapsing onto the bench parallel. Her training top was stuck to her skin with a thick film of sweat, but she didn’t even care. She just wanted to lay in peace for a few moments before continuing with the rest of her day. Alex used her forearm to cover her eyes from the hard florescent lights of the locker room, allowing herself time alone. The sounds of the locker room became distant to her - mere background noise to her thoughts.

“From what I remember, you had energy that could keep you going for days. What happened to it?”

The striker almost fell off of the bench in surprise. She didn’t hear anyone coming up to her nor did she feel the shadow of someone standing next to her. She sat up in a quick, jerked motion. Her eyes blinked in order to adjust to the lights of the locker room once again. She looked up to see an entertained Tobin Heath with her arms crossed standing in front of her.

“Uh,” Alex started. She was flustered by the fact that after being surprised by her ex showing up and being watched all training, Tobin was right in front of her with that stupid smile she was known her. Alex’s brain and mouth seemed to be two steps behind what was actually happening. They managed to catch up in the awkward pause that filled between the two women. “Well, that energy fades with age.” Alex wanted to hit herself for the dumbest reply she could’ve thought of. Years apart and that was the first thing she could say to Tobin?

Tobin offered a soft chuckle anyway with a shrug of her shoulders. “You’re right, but you still looked great out there. You always have.”

Was Tobin Heath flirting with her?

The striker wrinkled her nose, disagreement evidence in her expression. “Not really, but thanks.” She could feel the blush rising to her cheeks, but was grateful for already being flushed. “You looked like a natural out there with us,” she commented. “How long have you been stateside? It seems like jet lagged isn’t even affecting you.”

“I flew in last night,” Tobin shrugged as if it were no big deal.

“You flew in last night?” Mana gaped from a few lockers down, pulling her training top off. “Dude, you’re crazy.”

“Or just too in love with the game to care about anything else,” the international midfielder countered with a sheepish smile.

“Whatever it is,” Christine said from her position on the bench across the one Alex was occupying. “I like it. You’re gonna do great here, kid.”

Alex watched in amazement at how quickly her team was adapting to Tobin and vice versa. The girl literally stepped onto the field just today and she was already fitting in so easily. Tobin seemed to execute drills almost flawlessly. Even if she didn’t get it right away, someone helped her and two seconds later, they were sharing a joke or having an interesting conversation. It wasn’t surprising in the slightest to Alex though. If anything, it should have been expected. Tobin was always getting along with everyone and fitting in with anyone and anything almost immediately. It was just who she was and something Alex had once adored and envied.

“Hey Alex,” Tobin said, bringing her back to the current scene in the locker room. “It’s good to see you again.”

She offered a smile and a quick wink - so quick Alex was half-convinced she imagined it - and then walked towards the showers, peeling her shirt off as she went. Alex wondered if Tobin remembered how the young striker used to run her fingertips along Tobin’s back muscles in quiet darkness.

 


	3. Two: The Weird Stage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No matter who you were, Tobin Heath managed to find a way to leave a trail of mystery, almost as if she was daring you to figure her out.

The two roommates trudged into their apartment, dumping their bags on the hardwood floor as soon as they stepped in. Their ride back to the apartment was silent mainly due to the facts Allie knocked out almost as soon as she buckled her seatbelt, and Alex was still stunned by the reveal of the new international. Allie stretched halfway between the door and the couch, making a strange groaning noise that caused Alex to make a face.

“Tired princess?” Alex teased, passing by her to get to the kitchen.

“Shut up,” Allie mumbled, rubbing her eyes. “Today was rough.” She slowly followed Alex into the kitchen, immediately making her way to the fridge.

Alex simply grabbed an apple and washed it off, snickering at Allie. “That’s what happens when you stay up late.”

The midfielder sent her roommate a death glare that was enough to get her to stop talking. Alex put her hands up in feigned surrender before taking a bite of her apple. The two fell into a comfortable silence save for the sounds of Alex biting into her apple and Allie rummaging through the refrigerator until she found an appetizing snack. “I’m so ordering takeout.”

“I was hoping you would,” Alex grinned. “I wasn’t going to survive on this apple alone, you know.”

The older one laughed, shaking her head as she propped herself up on the stool in front of the counter. “I can’t believe we didn’t think of any French players this morning. I feel like it was obvious now.”

Alex almost choked on the latest bite of her apple, not expecting the conversation to come up so quickly. Then again, it was Allie; The girl loved to talk about anything and everything no matter what it was. She chewed the remaining bits slowly before answering, “It’s pretty surprising.”

“She’s so talented,” Allie commented. “I’ve seen her play while I was in France a few years ago. Her skills are to die for.”

The striker had to force herself to keep a straight face as she heard Allie rave on about Tobin. A smile was trying to find its way onto her face, but the last thing she wanted was Allie interrogating her on why it was there. “Yeah,” she commented offhandedly as she eyed her half eaten apple. “She’s really talented.”

“I could’ve played with her if she hadn’t moved to France,” the blonde added. “She moved right before I transferred to North Carolina, you know. It would’ve been cool to be her teammate. Anson used to talk about her a lot my first year there. He missed her. I’m pretty sure any coach would.”

Alex nodded, growing slightly irritated with the whole conversation. She didn’t want to talk about Tobin and her past. Any talk of Tobin when she used to live here and play for North Carolina only reminded Alex of the days she used to be head over heels for the quirky midfielder. She didn’t need old memories resurfacing because her and Tobin happened years ago and it wasn’t something that she needed or wanted to be reminded of.

It wasn’t because she hated Tobin. There was no way in hell she could hate Tobin. The girl left to make sure a career in soccer would be the best for her, and honestly in the end, Alex was the one who told her to go to France. At first, she tried anything to get Tobin to stay stateside, but when anything related to France came up, Alex could see the light in Tobin’s eyes and the excited expressions she’d try to hide whenever she was around the striker. It was obvious that Alex was a big part - if not the only part - holding Tobin back from giving an immediate “yes” to France. Once that had settled in to Alex’s mind, she was guilt-ridden and couldn’t stand to think she’d hold Tobin back from something that could possibly be the best thing that’s ever happened to her. No matter how many times Tobin told her that she was the best thing that’s ever happened.

Years later, Alex knew France was the right choice for Tobin. They both did.

“Alex…?” Allie called, looking at her with furrowed eyebrows from her position on the stool. “Are you there?”

The younger girl snapped back to the present at the sound of her name. “Uh yeah, sorry. I was just thinking…”

“Now that I think about it,” Allie started, propping her elbows up on the counter. “You’ve been weird all day. Like at practice, weren’t yourself.”

“What are you talking about Allie?” she feigned oblivion, tossing the core of her apple into the trashcan. She didn’t realize the way Tobin had thrown her off was obvious to anyone, but Allie did know her better than most of her teammates.

Allie frowned, aware that something was occupying her roommate’s mind. “You were off today.”

Alex racked her brain for a good enough explanation for her behavior, but nothing seemed to sound right. The thought of telling any of her teammates and friends about her past with Tobin hadn’t ever occurred to her. It seemed to her like something she could just keep to herself without any problem. It wasn’t like Tobin would say something, would she? She never was the type to. Hopefully that didn’t change while she was away.

“I don’t know,” she finally shrugged lamely. “Just feeling weird.”

Her friend’s eyes studied Alex carefully, but questioned no more. It was barely acceptable, but she wouldn’t be getting interrogated for the remainder of the day.

“You’ll never guess who our new international is,” Alex said into her phone after she was sure Allie was in her room minding her own business that night.

She’d been itching to call her best friend as soon as she saw Tobin laughing with Sinc. The fact that they lived on opposite sides of the country was frustrating enough, but Kelley always managed to stay up late enough for Alex to be able to get settled after a long day and call her if they needed to catch up. If it were up to the both of them, they’d probably still be rooming together in LA if there was a team in that area. Having Kelley be so far away was difficult at times, but they managed to make it work.

“Who is it?” the girl on the other like asked, curiosity present in her voice. “Is it someone cute? Is it a European?”

Alex laughed, biting her lip as she thought about to how to answer the question. Leave it to Kelley to have her priorities straight. “Um,  yes to European. I’m pleading the fifth amendment on the first question.”

“That means she’s hot!” Kelley accused, and Alex could picture the big smirk forming on her freckled face. “Who is it?! And don’t tell me to guess, cause I’m not going to sit here and guess,” she informed her.

The striker spent a couple of moments contemplating how she should even say it. Of course, she decided to get straight to the information. In a quiet voice she said, “It’s Tobin.”

“Tobin?!” Kelley exclaimed. “Tobin as in our Tobin? Tarheel Tobin? Frenchy Tobin?”

“Yes Kelley,” Alex confirmed, rolling her eyes at Kelley’s outburst of questions. It was so typical of her. “Tarheel Tobin, Frenchy Tobin, my ex-girlfriend Tobin.”

The defender was silent on the other end of a minute before saying, “Woah.”

“I know. I figured you knew. Don’t you still talk to her?”

She sighed. “Um, it’s on and off. Sometimes we’ll catch up. The past couple of years I haven’t really heard much from her.”

“Oh,” Alex said, not realizing just how many American ties Tobin cut off once everything in France started working out for her.

Kelley and Tobin were friends before Alex even knew either of them. They’d been best friends in the youth national camps, and that friendship carried on in college even with miles between them. The two had been inseparable, and they trouble when they were together always pulling pranks and being mischievous. Alex could have only assumed that Kelley would have definitely been one of the people Tobin kept up with even while being in Europe.

“Well?”

“Well what?” she asked, confused.

“Was it weird? DId you guys talk at all?”

The younger girl chewed her bottom lip, trying to figure out a way to answer the questions without jumbling her thoughts. “It was definitely weird, like, way weird. I don’t know. I just...never expected her to be playing here again. I especially didn’t expect her to come to Portland,” she explained. “We didn’t talk at all during training, but she came up to me in the locker room. It wasn’t anything big.”

“What’d she say?” Kelley asked, obviously eager to hear what was going on.

“It was nothing,” Alex shrugged. “Just a quick ‘hey, how are you’ kind of thing, I guess.”

It was a last second decision to withhold the content of the short conversation from Kelley. She wasn’t even sure what to make of the conversation from earlier. Tobin couldn’t have been flirting with her, right? She just flew in from France and hadn’t spoken to Alex in years. There was no way. Tobin was just friendly, like she had always been. Alex was thinking about the conversation too much, that’s all.

“Well, looks like I have a friend I need to call tomorrow,” Kelley told her.

\--

Another day, another training, and another set of hours of being in Tobin’s presence. Alex could still feel eyes on her at certain points of the morning, but every time she turned to look, no one was looking at her. Instead, Tobin was dutifully performing the task at hand with ease and agility. She looked so natural among them, and honestly she was even better than some of the others who had been not only with the Thorns, but playing soccer longer than she had. Most of their teammates fawned over Tobin. They were all so impressed with her skill, adaptation and work ethic. Alex noticed that Tobin was immediately hitting it off with Christine. They seemed comfortable around each other, and in their small scrimmages they found each other naturally as they charged towards the goal. It was a brilliant show to watch, to say the least.

Paul called everyone together to work on simple passing and control drills at one point, having everyone pair up. Alex, in her own little world at the time, was too busy to realize everyone was pairing up around her. Her go-to partners were already taken and everyone else seemed to claim the person right next to them.

“Hey, you okay there?”

The voice brought Alex out of her thoughts and back to training. She blinked, seeing Tobin at her side with a ball tucked under her arm. The midfielder’s hair was in a messy ponytail and some of her hair was stuck to her forehead with sweat. A twitch of a smile tried to find its way to Alex’s lips before she could protest.

“Oh yeah, I was just thinking.”

The French player had an amused smile on her face. “Do you even know what we’re doing?”

Alex scoffed, taking the ball from under Tobin’s arms. “Of course I do!”

Her eyes slightly narrowed at Tobin, giving her a small glare. Just because she seemed to be adjusting at a fast pace didn’t mean she could act like she knew more than Alex. This was Alex’s domain and she’d be damned if Tobin Heath took that away from her. “I’m not stupid.”

Tobin - with an amused expression still present - put her hands up in surrender, shrugging. “I never said you were. You just looked out of it.”

“Well I’m fine,” Alex snapped, regretting the tone in her voice a moment later. She softened, giving a little sigh. She hated being wrong, especially in an environment like this where she knew every little part of it. “What drill are we doing again?”

Tobin smiled, taking the ball back from Alex’s grasp. “Come on superstar, let’s work on our passing skills.”

Alex only nodded, watching Tobin walk away to give themselves space to pass. As she watched her, the striker realized she never thought about what it would really be like to talk to Tobin again. Of course, she always wondered if they ever would meet again. It was bound to happen with both of them being international players, but seeing Tobin off the field and communicating with her was a different story. She always figured it would maybe be awkward. She wasn’t even sure what they’d say to each other. It was either that, or they’d fall back into old routines.

The situation Alex found herself in with Tobin now confused her. Tobin wasn’t acting like she didn’t know Alex; she didn’t go out of her way to ignore the striker. She wasn’t trying to pick up where she left off years ago when they spent a long night holding each other before Tobin started a new life in a new country. Tobin was just being...Tobin. That’s what had Alex stumped. She wasn’t sure what to make of their interactions. They were friendly, but to what extent? It always frustrated Alex that there was an air of mystery surrounding Tobin. No matter who you were, Tobin Heath managed to find a way to leave a trail of mystery, almost as if she was daring you to figure her out.

\--

The restaurant was empty for the most part, if you didn’t include the two long tables that had been connected to fit Portland’s twenty Thorns players in the back. In order to establish “team bonding” and welcoming Tobin to the team somewhat officially, Mana decided she’d get the team together at the restaurant they often came to for special events with the team. Leave it to Mana to do it. It’d been evident she was interested in Tobin as soon as she saw her at their first training of the week. Whether it was admiration or affection, Alex couldn’t tell. Either way, it seemed slightly endearing because it was Mana, and well, Mana was simply adorable in her own little way.

Alex was seated between Allie and Rachel, and somehow Tobin was sitting right in front of her. On her left, there was Christine and on the right was Mana, of course. To no surprise, Tobin was the center of everyone’s attention. They all wanted to know what it was like to be an American overseas, playing for a national team that wasn’t one she grew up planning to be on. They listened to all her stories, the embarrassing ones from when she first moved to her every day antics with teammates and friends and every little thing in between. Girls took turns asking her questions, wanting to know more about her and her life in France.

Tobin was a very open person. She didn’t have much to hide, but she was definitely an interesting character. She wasn’t one for the spotlight, but she didn’t shy away from it when it happened to be on her. Instead, the midfielder seemed to bask in it - not in a gloating way, but in a rather subtle, appreciative way. She seemed comfortable with everything happening, and the smile on her face hadn’t faded since walking into the restaurant and recognizing her teammates waiting the front door. It drove Alex crazy. For one reason, she was trying to fight the smile and pride she felt in her. There were moments that she wanted to say something about knowing Tobin before the rest of them; she wanted to let them know “yeah, that’s my Tobin,” but on the other hand she was perturbed by how easily Tobin fit in with the girls. That, and that Tobin now had a whole new life that Alex really had no clue about. She honestly couldn’t tell you more than what social media provided over the past few years - and Tobin hardly even used that.

So for the most part, Alex listened, smiled and laughed at all the appropriate moments. She watched Tobin’s features carefully. How her eyebrows rose in excitement as she told a crazy story, how her eyes sparkled when she reminisced about all the places in France she’d been to, how jittery she seemed to get when she so much talked about having the ball at her feet. Something about all of it felt familiar to Alex in a way. Those expressions were the ones she once knew so well, but now they held meaning to things she had no clue about. It was yet another thing that had Alex stuck. It was like she knew Tobin, but didn’t really know her.

Tobin was also watching. She’d catch glimpses of Alex every now and then when eyes weren’t fully on her. In some moments, her honey brown eyes would meet Alex’s and a hint of a smile would be on her face, as if they had a secret between them, which was technically true. Every time their eyes met, the American striker felt her heart speed as her breath caught just long enough to throw her off for a moment. It was ridiculous, really. Years later, both moved on and well off without each other, Tobin Heath could still make her feel this way.

Dinner was winding down, and the girls were debating on whether or not they should order dessert. Tobin was in no means out of stories, but she had managed to slowly guide the conversation away from herself and towards her other teammates. She asked about their stories, their lives and their moments on the pitch. It always amazing how she did it. She was so interested in every single teammate, so eager to learn and so willing to listen. It floored every girl at the table. Alex had to stop herself from beaming with pride for what seemed liked the millionth time that night.

“I’m really tempted to get this mousse cake,” Mana admitted, her eyes staring longingly at the picture in the menu.

Alex laughed, shaking her head. “Then order it, Mana. Eating chocolate once won’t ruin your healthy lifestyle,” she reminded her.

“Oh no!” Stephanie Catley cried from a few seats down. “Mana not eating healthy?! How dare she!”

The girls burst into laughter, always ready to tease each other in any given moment. Mana only pouted, giving Alex a slight glare. “When you’re 30 and fat from all the chocolate you eat when you’re on your period, don’t come crying to me.”

At this, Tobin laughed, quirking an eyebrow at Alex across from her. “You still eat chocolate like crazy every month, Morgan?”

The striker scoffed, crossing her arms. “It’s not that bad anymore!”

“It’s pretty bad,” Mana commented. “Last season, Allie and I had to take turns making runs to the grocery store for her.”

Allie looked from Tobin and Alex with narrowed eyes and slight confusion. She knew she was missing something. “You two know each other?”

Alex’s blue eyes slightly widened, not facing Allie. She remained fixated on Tobin. She hadn’t told anyone on the team, and she could safely assume Tobin hadn’t either. Tobin looked from Allie to Alex, immediately recognizing the striker’s look of slight panic on her face. Without words, she knew exactly what she needed to do.

“Yeah,” Tobin smiled, her eyes remaining on Alex. “We’ve known each other for years.” She was relaxed, seemingly not surprised at all at the question.

“How do you guys know each other then?” another teammate asked. Alex wasn’t sure who, she was still keeping eyes on Tobin, afraid she’d give anything away if she did.

Tobin’s eyes met Alex’s once again, and it was evident the memory of their first encounter was flashing in their minds. The lips twitched upwards in a smile and Tobin had to hold back a laugh.

“Kelley,” the both answered, their smiles widening as they said it.

“O’Hara,” the younger one added to make it clear. Her eyes still held Tobin’s and by the look on the midfielder’s face, Alex could tell she was recalling their crazy adventures with their friend.

“We met in college,” Tobin explained. “I happened to be in California over the summer, and Alex was getting ready to go to Cal…”

The smile never faded on Alex’s face as Tobin told the story - their story. She jumped in during parts she felt Tobin didn’t tell adequately enough, or if she seemed to be missing something. They both left out how charmed Alex was by Tobin. They both left out how speechless Tobin seemed to be in certain moments when Kelley left them momentarily. They didn’t tell them how Tobin slyly put her number in Alex’s phone and then asked to go out the next week. In the midst of their teammates laughing at the end, they looked at each other and Alex looked at her with gratitude.

Somehow, they were still on the same wavelength.

 


	4. Three: Shifting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the way Alex suddenly grew hot, she knew there was more behind Tobin’s answer than the soccer.

Portland was buzzing. Not just around Providence Park, but the whole city of Portland was buzzing. They’d prepared months for this moment. The start of a new NWSL season was upon them, and the whole city knew it. There was always something special about Portland. Soccer City, USA couldn’t be more of an accurate description of the Oregon town. In the depths of the stadium, amidst the loud commotion happening in the stands and outside the stadium, twenty women were scattered around the locker room. They were able to hear the faint sounds of the crowds that were gathering in the stands to watch them play.

Alex was curled into her locker, forehead pressed against her knees, letting the pulse of the music in her headphones take over. Her thoughts were calmed as the last of the notes rang loudly in her ears. She was no longer nervous, just excited. It did the trick for her every game day. All her other rituals were important too, but this one was the one that sealed the deal before she walked onto that pitch.

Her eyes slowly opened as she lifted her head from her knees and pulled off her headphones. She looked around the locker room, watching each of her teammates do their own things to prepare. A few were having quiet conversations, letting the music in the locker room cover their voices. Others were doing their pre game rituals they followed so religiously. The striker’s eyes finally fell on the midfielder sitting with her shoulders slightly hunched and her eyes closed. Her headphones were sitting on her head comfortably and the way her lips moved with as if she was speaking to herself, Alex knew Tobin was singing along. Tobin’s eyes were closed and her head was bowed slightly, leaving her so vulnerable. Alex had only seen this Tobin a handful of times. Her favorite was when they were in a church, long after people left. Tobin would be on her knees, palms pressed together and her head bowed down. Her brows would always be slightly furrowed, but she looked so at peace. Prayer was what she turned to, and it was a special occasion when one got to witness Tobin Heath talking to God.

In the short week and a half following the “team bonding” dinner, they managed to find their rhythm between each other again. It was like they used to be, but in a completely different and new way. First of all, there was so much they’d missed out on by being apart for four years. It was like they knew each other, but only by bits and pieces. There were things that were no longer there or are now there that hadn’t been. It was like trying to start over even if you already knew the person. Somehow, they found a friendship between them. It wasn’t like they were best friends; they were still building, but it was something better than nothing.

There were still moments where Tobin would reach out to wrap an arm around Alex’s waist, but then awkwardly stop herself. Other moments, Alex would find herself staring at Tobin’s lips rather than her face as she spoke. Both of them were guilty of awkward knee bumps and pressed arms, but neither knew what to do about it. So each time, one would pull away, then the other would realize why and they’d both sit there for a moment, letting the awkwardness sit between them. Nothing could erase their past, but Alex was more than willing to write their future.

Alex waited until Tobin’s fingers brushed against her forehead, chest and both of her shoulders - the sign of the cross - before gingerly slipping out of her small locker. She knew it signaled the end of her personal moment, and a newfound focus on the task at hand. The striker left her phone and her headphones on the chair in front of her locker before making her way to the bench. Just as the midfielder slid the headphones off, Alex seated herself next to her.

“Nervous?” Alex asked, but she already knew the answer in the way Tobin’s knee slightly bounced up and down with no particular rhythm.

Tobin let her headphones hang around her neck, looking up from the ground to meet Alex’s eyes. They held an excitement to them; Tobin knew that look well. To her, it seemed like Alex was ready to take on the world. “A little,” she admitted, shrugging slightly. “You weren’t kidding about the crowd.”

The younger one let out a laugh, seeing the amazement in Tobin’s eyes and hearing it in her genuine voice. “Just wait until we play Seattle,” she told her. “It’ll be even crazier.”

“I can’t wait,” Tobin grins, to which Alex can’t help but grin back. Tobin’s smiles had always been so contagious; it was the perfect remedy when Alex was sad or upset or frustrated. Just one look at that smile and she couldn’t stay mad any longer.

Alex could still see the nerves peeping through the typically calm, laid back midfielder. Her knee bobbing up and down was an obvious giveaway. Another was her slightly tightened jaw. Her eyes were darting as she put away her headphones, unable to focus on one thing. There were still parts of her Alex knew so well.

“Hey,” she said quietly, her voice lowered to grab Tobin’s attention. It proved to work when Tobin looked away from her belongings and back at her. “You’re going to be great out there, I already know you are. Portland’s going to love their new star. Just stick to what you know, and you’ll be fine. He’ll be watching you the whole game, just like he watches you and protects you every day. You’re going to be amazing.”

Alex was never one to strictly follow her religion, but she did attend church every once in awhile, and a prayer or two every now and then didn’t hurt. She did understand how important it was to Tobin. She believed in it so deeply, followed and committed so fully that it often left Alex speechless. It was a humbling thing, really. While they dated, Alex often accompanied Tobin to church when they were together; those were the days she’d get to witness Tobin talking to the Lord. Those were some of her favorite moments of just Tobin.

The lights in Tobin’s eyes changed. She seemed lighter, her shoulders were a little more relaxed. “Thank you, Alex.” It was the way she said it, the way she looked so deeply into Alex that made shivers run down the striker’s spine.

“Show KC what you got.”

\--

They found the back of the net in the thirtieth minute, and it couldn’t have happened any better. Steph blocked a shot from Amy Rodriguez, playing it into space that she herself ran up to chase after. Beating out another Kansas City player, she dribbled down the left flank quickly, picking her head up. With one more touch, she sent the ball up ahead to an open Tobin who brought the ball down to her feet in one swift motion. Her feet moved before her brain could process the situation - much like they always did on the field - and she cut to the inside, beating a defender to the ball. The midfielder lifted her head, analyzing the open space towards the right of the goal, and a sprinting Alex Morgan. Anyone else would’ve passed it to Christine who was open and calling for the ball out wide. The French midfielder played the ball across the eighteen towards the right post, holding her breath as soon as the ball left her foot. Out of seemingly nowhere, Alex ran in and shot it into the upper 90, beating out Nicole Barnhart.

The sound of the stadium was deafening. It was a sound that only pumped Alex even more after a moment like that. She wasn’t sure how she got to that ball first. She wasn’t sure how - or if - Tobin knew she’d make it. But as soon as the ball beat Barnie, her hands flew into the air and she began sprinting in Tobin’s direction. The midfielder was already sprinting over, and their teammates were trying to reach Alex too. Tobin was the first one to her though, and rightfully so, and they both jumped a little, catching each other mid-air. Tobin was the first to find her footing, even if she stumbled a bit, and they laughed and grinned as more teammates threw their arms around them in celebration.

As the celebration died down and teammates started peeling away to return to their positions, Alex nudged Tobin’s shoulder playfully, grinning as she said, “Portland’s definitely in love with you now, Tobin Heath.”

“We’re back, baby!” Christine exclaimed at the bar the Thorns found themselves at a few hours later. She held up her first bottle of beer, her grin widening as all her teammates and the few friends and family that were in town did the same. “It’ll only get even better from here!”

“To Portland!” Allie said, lifting her bottle even higher.

“To Portland!” the others echoed before clinking beer bottles and taking sips.

The loud music drowned out most of the chatter, causing people to talk a little louder for their voices to be heard. The Portland Thorns were on a high after their 2-0 victory over Kansas City. It wasn’t official, but there was an unspoken rivalry between the two teams after meeting multiple times in the semi finals of the league over the years. To beat them in the first game of the season was a good sign indeed. After the first goal, Steph Catley slotted a low ball in to Christine, who managed to slide it into the right corner. The girls had every right to celebrate, so it was no surprise they did.

Alex found herself at a table with Allie, Mana and Tobin; the four of them drinking - well, Mana was practically chugging - from the bottles in between laughter and bright smiles. It was a fun atmosphere to be in, and it was one of the reasons Alex would never trade Portland for any other club.

“Is she always like that?” Tobin asked, eyeing Mana with a bit of concern as she chugged the remainder of the bottle down with Allie egging her on.

Alex couldn’t help but laugh at the sight before replying, “More of less, yeah.” She took another sip of her own drink. “I think tonight it’s because she played a full fifty-five minutes,” the striker added in a lower voice, so only Tobin could hear her.

Tobin’s brows furrowed, turning to face Alex. “What do you mean? Mana doesn’t play much?”

The younger one sighed, shaking her head. “She used to - mainly our first season, really - but since Paul came in, Mana’s lucky to see more than 15 minutes. So a start and more than a half? That’s really big for her.”

Tobin nodded slowly, taking it all in. “Huh,” she mumbled, looking Mana again, whose face was now red and her laughter added to the noise around them.

Allie turned to the two of them, starting a conversation to involve all four seated. Soon enough they were all laughing and interrupting each other, recounting plays from earlier that night. Eventually, more of their teammates joined them, and it was a group of seven or eight girls trying to talk over each other in between fits of laughter. When the attention wasn’t on her, Alex turned to Tobin.

“Your first game, win and assist all in one,” she commented. “How do you feel about that?”

Tobin turned to face her. She’d had a few drinks, but it was enough to keep her buzzed for a little while; Alex was the same. The French midfielder answered, “I’m really glad I ended up in Portland.”

From the way Alex suddenly grew hot, she knew there was more behind Tobin’s answer than the soccer.

\--

A few weeks later, the Thorns still hadn’t lost a game. Three wins and two ties into the season had the Thorns looking good so far. Somewhere amongst the practices, games, events and team outings, Alex found Tobin by her side more often than not. Whatever weird friendship they had was growing stronger, and Alex didn’t know what to make of it. It wasn’t like they hung out on their own in their free time, but whenever Alex was out with her friends on the team, Tobin was right there with her. She liked having the midfielder there. Things just seemed better with her presence, her smile, her laugh...simply her. To be honest, Tobin was one of the best things that ever happened to Portland.

So after training one day when Tobin casually leaned against Alex’s locker as she pulled on a new top and asked, “Hey, what are you doing later?” It was natural for Alex to suddenly grow conscious of everything.

The striker tugged at the bottom of her shirt then ran a hand through her damp hair. “Uh, I don’t have anything planned for now.”

“Great,” a smile spread across Tobin’s face, her features lighting up. “I want to explore Portland more, and I don’t want to do it alone.”

Alex almost asked why she didn’t ask Mana or Courtney instead - she seemed to be getting along with them very well. But instead she smiled back, unable to herself and nodded. “What time?”

“How about we go grab some lunch together and we can have the rest of the afternoon?”

Tobin Heath was never forward with what she did and didn’t want. At least the Tobin Heath that Alex dated wasn’t. Maybe that too had changed in France. Alex didn’t know what to make of it. Still, she smiled even wider and nodded. “Let me just get Allie to take my things home.”

It was still blazing hot, but the sun was beginning to show signs of setting. Alex’s feet were tired, and she was pretty sure as soon as she got home she’d collapse onto her bed (if she could even get that far), but there was nothing she’d regret about this day. She watched Tobin walk ahead of her, taking in the greenery that Portland had to offer. This had to be their third park today, but Tobin was still so mesmerised by it all that it didn’t even matter.

She watched Tobin now. Her eyes were on the plants and flowers that outlined their trail, their honey brown color looking lighter than they usually were. The midfielder’s hair was still in its loose ponytail from earlier that morning, and the sweat had loose strands and baby hairs clinging onto her face. There was nothing Alex would want to do more this moment than to be with Tobin. Even though they weren’t talking, and Tobin was too busy admiring Portland’s beauty to even notice her, Alex was witnessing a vulnerable, honest Tobin. It was almost as private as watching Tobin pray in a church.

“It’s all so beautiful,” Tobin hardly spoke, her words coming out in a loud whisper. “To be out here…”

“I know,” Alex nodded slowly, falling into step with Tobin. “On some days, I like to come and take runs here by myself when we’re not training or getting ready for a games. I don’t even have music on. It’s calming.”

Tobin smiled, the image of Alex running like the wind in such a tranquil place pleasing her. “Maybe I’ll do that, too.”

The younger one quirked an eyebrow, a playful frown on her face. “Trying to steal my good spots, Heath?”

“Maybe,” Tobin smirked back. “This city’s too good to not use to my full advantage, you know.”

Alex shrugged. “Portland’s weird, but nice.”

“Like you,” the French midfielder gently teased.

It got her a slight shove with a shoulder, but Tobin slyly kept her shoulders pressed together as they walked. Occasionally their bare arms would brush against each other and Alex felt an immense heat where Tobin’s skin met hers. It took her longer to form her sentences with the distraction of Tobin right there.

“Thanks I guess,” she rolled her eyes. “But remind me on an off day to take you out hiking with me and Mana. You’ll absolutely love it, and the sun rise from the mountain Mana’s house is located is amazing. It’s so beautiful and breath taking and-” Alex was cut off by the sound of Tobin’s soft chuckle. She turned her head, looking at Tobin in confusion. “What’s so funny?”

The older one chuckled again, shaking her head. “Nothing, nothing.” She had that uncontainable smile on her face, the one Alex fell in love with so quickly that she’d do anything to see it on Tobin’s face as often as she could. “I’ve missed you. That’s all.”

Alex looked away, trying to hide the sudden flush of her cheeks though she couldn’t even tell if it was obvious due to the amount of time they’d spent outside. Of course, she always hoped Tobin had missed her while she was away, but she never really knew. They hadn’t talked since Tobin left. Not that Alex had gone through a stage where she was mad at Tobin; she just wanted Tobin to be able to do her thing in France with nothing holding her back. Alex was definitely something that could hold Tobin back, and she didn’t want to hurt the midfielder’s career that way. There was also the fact that Alex wanted Tobin to make the move. Oblivious, wandering Tobin. Could she really have expected Tobin to know what she wanted? Every time Alex left the guessing up to Tobin, it didn’t really get through. Why would that have changed when Tobin decided to start her life over in France? It didn’t, obviously. There wasn’t a call or “I’m okay” message from her at all in the time that passed.

But here they were now. Somehow, by the grace of maybe God himself, Tobin was back in America, playing for the Portland Thorns and now walking alongside Alex with their arms brushing against each other as they returned to Tobin’s rented car. Seconds chances happened for a reason, but Alex couldn’t seem to make sense of it all. It was hard enough to be teammates and friend with Tobin, but still have the urge to hold her and kiss her like she used to. Whatever was happening between them had no clear line and it confused the hell out of Alex. But that didn’t mean she was opposed to it in the slightest.

“I’ve missed you too,” Alex replied, risking a glance at the older girl. Her features were relaxed and content, seemingly happy with where she was and who she was with. That in itself set Alex’s insides into a frenzy.

\--

“I’ll see you bright and early at training tomorrow,” the older girl promised as they stood facing each other at Alex’s door step.

The sun had set on their way back to the apartment and Alex struggled to keep her eyes open on the way home, but of course Tobin’s quiet demeanor was comforting enough to let herself get away with a few minutes of rest in the car.

Alex smiled softly. “I had fun today. Thanks.”

The midfielder shook her head, a soft chuckle escaping her lips. “No, thank you for showing me around Portland. I’ll have to take you up on that hiking trip with Mana.”

“Can’t wait.”

“Good night Tobin,” the striker said quietly, knowing the midfielder had to make her way back to her apartment upstairs before Steph and Vero started to wonder where the other international was.

There was a good foot between them, but still Alex could still feel heat emanating from Tobin, and she could hear the older girl’s slow, careful breaths. Alex’s heartbeat seemed to speed up ten times faster, feeling the tension of the moment getting to her. If she wasn’t mistaken, she could’ve sworn she watched Tobin’s honey brown eyes flicker down to her lips for longer than a moment before returning back to the ocean blue eyes watching her.

“Good night Lex,” Tobin winked before slowly walking away.

Alex watched her until Tobin rounded the corner, and stayed outside until she heard Tobin make it all the way upstairs to the next floor. Biting her lip to hide the stupid smile she knew was threatening to break out at any given moment, she unlocked the door to her apartment and practically waltzed in. She didn’t even notice the teammate that resided on her couch with her roommate.

“Hello to you too,” Allie greeted, quirking an eyebrow. “Did you have a nice afternoon?”

“I think that Portland heat’s getting to her.” Alex turned to see Mana snacking on some fruits from the kitchen on their couch. “Look at her.”

“Why are you here?” Alex asked, dodging Allie’s earlier question and instead conversing with Mana. “Shouldn’t you be at home with your girlfriend or something?”

Mana scoffed, shaking her head. “Nice try, Al. You’re glowing.”

“What, did Servando randomly appear today?” Allie teased.

The striker gave both of them a strange look. “Servando? What are you even saying? Servando and I - we haven’t - I haven’t - he’s been in - what?”

Alex wasn’t even sure she could form words to articulate her confusion. She hadn’t spoken to Servando in awhile. Sure they occasionally still went out to have dinner or grab lunch or something, but that didn’t mean anything. Not to Alex, at least. Servando’s end was different, but he was a smart enough man to understand that they were no longer actually a serious couple.

“No,” she quickly shook her head, rolling her eyes. “I just had a lot of fun today, even if I may turn into a lobster from how long I was outside,” she added, inspecting the red spots on her arms.

“If you say so.” From the way Mana said it, Alex knew that Mana was noticing something that everyone else wasn’t. Out of all people, it was her. Of course it was.

“I’m going to shower and head to bed,” Alex announced, already walking towards the hallway. “I’ll see you guys in the morning.”

If she closed her eyes, she could see Tobin’s contagious smile.

 


	5. Four: Compromising Positions

Practices were routine by late May, but by no means did they become easier as time went on. Week in and week out it was training, games, repeat. With injuries flying in and out, everyone was still trying to compete for starting spots on the team. Alex started every game so far, but things were getting difficult. Finding the back of the night was harder, and defenders seemed to be on her the moment she had the ball at her feet in a few games. Her frustration was going, but it only made her train harder, possibly bruising a few teammates as she fired shots. She didn’t mean to hurt them; she knew they couldn’t handle anymore injuries. It just didn’t help that no matter what she did, her efforts in training weren’t transferring onto the field. People were talking. Had Alex Morgan lost her spark? Of course not. She needed to show them.

The Thorns found themselves flying out to New Jersey on a Thursday morning, and Alex was more than beside herself. In hours, she’d be able to actually see her best friend rather than look at her on a computer screen, read the words she typed or hear her voice over the phone. Tobin was excited as well. She hadn’t really seen Kelley since she left, and the two were proving to be good friends despite the years in between that seemed like a huge gap.

Alex somehow found herself sitting next to Mana on the plane, the third seat in their row empty for one reason or another. The two were chatting mindlessly for majority of the ride, and Alex loved it because Mana made her laugh more than others did. The young, talented midfielder was always a bright spot in Alex’s life that she was very grateful to have. Another thing about Mana was that she could read people better than most, and that thought comforted and scared Alex at the same time. It was obvious that Mana already knew there was more to whatever was going on with Tobin than what Alex let on. Alex was just concerned on how long it would take for her to figure it out.

“So, you and Tobin…”

And there it was. Mana’s voice was lowered and hushed, meaning things were about to go from their light, playful conversation to a serious one in a few moments. Alex looked at her, and she could tell the hawaiian was trying to hide a smirk and a suggestive raise of her eyebrows.

Alex scoffed, rolling her eyes in attempt to play it off. “What about me and Tobin? There’s no ‘me and Tobin.’”

Mana laughed, shaking her head. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you two have something going on.”

She wiggled her eyebrows, mostly teasing the older girl. Alex’s jaw tightened slightly - in fact, her whole body tensed slightly. Did her and Tobin even have something going on? The striker definitely felt things when she was with Tobin, but she wasn’t even sure how the other girl felt about it. Was she being friendly or did she actually feel something too? Or was she simply a tease? Alex couldn’t tell and it was driving her insane. Mana noticed the change in Alex’s expression and all the playful expressions disappeared as she left out a small gasp.

“Oh my god. Do you?” she asked, eyes wide. “I mean, I wouldn’t blame you at all. In fact, Tobin’s really attractive so…”

“Uh,” the striker all but choked out, running a hand through her hair. She didn’t even know how to answer the question. She was also trying not to blush at Mana’s statement. She hadn’t told anyone that she dated Tobin, let alone that she agreed with Mana’s statement.

Sensing Alex’s struggle, the hawaiian put a hand on the girl’s arm, looking at her with her big brown eyes. “I know I’m not Allie or Kelley, and I know we haven’t known each other for a long time, but I’m here for you. I come to you when I need help so I hope you know you can do the same. I’m not going to judge you.”

Alex looked at Mana long and hard. She didn’t know how anyone would react to it; it was just something she didn’t really feel like sharing. But looking at Mana know, probably the one almost everyone went to with their problems - mainly with girls - it felt only right that she’d confide in the small midfielder. “Tobin and I...dated for awhile when we were in college,” Alex said quietly.

Mana blinked once, trying to process the information. It made Alex nervous; she couldn’t read the girl’s expression, which was typically easy to do. Mana was a very open person. “Oh,” she finally did. “So did it end badly?”

The striker shook her head immediately. “No, it wasn’t anything like that. It was a mutual break up,” she explained. “I mean we didn’t want to, but she was going to France and things were going to get complicated and I didn’t want to hold her back so we just...broke up. We haven’t talked since she left. Well, until she showed up at training.”

The midfielder nodded slowly, seemingly accepting the information as it was. “And now where are you guys? I noticed you guys are pretty good friends again.”

“I don’t know!” Alex let out a frustrated groan. “That’s the problem. We’re friends, but then I feel like there’s something more, but I never know with her. She’s just so casual about everything and it’s the most frustrating thing about her.” As she finished her little rant, she saw her friend trying to stifle a giggle, but miserably failing to do so. “What are you laughing at?”

Mana gave her a cheeky grin as she replied, “You’re so still in love with her.” There was a sparkle in her eye, and Alex knew the girl was enjoying this whole situation way too much for her own good.

“You’re no help whatsoever,” she muttered, crossing her arms and forming a small pout on her lips. Her eyes flickered to Tobin a few rows away on the other side. She was jamming to whatever was on her phone while Allie was completely knocked out next to her. Alex fought the smile that wanted to appear at the sight of Tobin nodding her head and mouthing the words to the song.

Mana chuckled. “Oh yeah, I’m so right.” She propped her elbow onto the armrest and rested her head in her hand. “Totally in love with her.”

“You’re annoying.”

“You still love me,” she reasoned. “And as for Tobin, I don’t think she’s seeing anyone. Maybe she still loves you too.”

\--

Somehow with Alex’s luck, she ended up being assigned to a room with Tobin. Not that she minded at all - in fact, she could possibly be described as overjoyed, but she knew Mana would be teasing her in a quiet, daunting manner. It was evident when Mana gave her a smirk and a quirk of her eyebrow as soon as her eyes skimmed the rooming assignments for the trip.

“Have fun,” was all the small hawaiian offered before grabbing her room card and finding her roommate.

Now, after settling in and a team dinner at a restaurant down the street, Alex was curled up on her bed, scrolling through her twitter feed as the muffled sound of the water falling reminded her Tobin was showering in the bathroom. She thought about her conversation earlier with Mana on the plane and looked at her phone screen for a long minute. Before she could process what was happening, her fingers were tapping away and somehow she found herself on Tobin Heath’s instagram profile. Of course curiosity was going to win her over in this situation, and she needed to know if Tobin was seeing anyone. Tobin wasn’t a very public person on what was going on in her life, but there had to be a least one picture if there was something she was seeing. So while the water ran Alex scrolled. Many of her posts involved girls. Most of them were teammates - with a few pictures of family here and there - or good friends she had and Alex vaguely knew. There were pictures of Tobin with her arm slung around a brunette, but there were at least three other pictures of Tobin in the same position with different ones. Yet still, something about that brunette bothered her. She was not only in her PSG pictures, but also the national team pictures, and she frequented them often.

Alex was so into her investigation - or stalking - that she hadn’t heard the water shut off, nor had she heard the bathroom door open.

“Hey, what’s that you’re looking at?”

At the sound of the voice, Alex slightly jumped in surprise, dropping her phone onto her pillow. “Oh, uh-” She looked up, flipping her phone to ensure her screen was facing downward.

Her words caught in her throat once she realized the situation she’d found herself in. Tobin Heath was in nothing more than a white hotel towel wrapping her waist and a dark blue Nike sports bra. The midfielder’s hair was still dripping wet and stuck her to her neck and back, leaving water drops to run down towards the towel. The thing that got to Alex the most was the chiseled abs Tobin had seen speaks of in and out of trainings and games - a great perk to being Tobin Heath’s friend and teammate. She didn’t realized how defined Tobin was. Damn, she must’ve put countless minutes in over the years to get that result. Sure, she’d already had some muscle there back in college, but this was...much improved. Alex’s hand reached up to cover her mouth, just in case she had been drooling. Thankfully her mouth was still very dry.

“Well?” Tobin asked, quirking an eyebrow as she reached over and grabbed shorts and a t-shirt. “What’s got you all into your phone? Is it a special someone?” she lightly teased.

“No!” Alex answered quickly, then realized her tone and tried to relax a little. “Nothing, I was just on Instagram.”

The midfielder let out a low chuckle, shaking her head. “Okay, I guess I’ll let that one get away.”

Alex breathed a silent sigh of relief and rolled her eyes. “Whatever,” she waved away, collecting her phone in her hands again before placing it onto the nightstand. While she was preoccupied, Tobin slipped on the rest of her clothes and placed her towel back inside the bathroom before plopping onto her bed.

“So I received some interesting news today,” Tobin said, sitting with her legs crossed and looking at Alex with a slight smile. Over the past two and a half months Tobin’s slight French undertone was slowly fading. It was still there - of course, it would take longer for it to disappear - but she was starting to sound American again, and it felt comforting to Alex in a way.

“Oh really?” she asked, quirking an eyebrow. She sat herself up, swinging her legs over the side of her bed to face her teammate. “What’s the news?”

A slight smug smile graced the midfielders face. “I got the call up for the end of June.”

Alex’s face took on a confused expression for a brief moment before her lips spread into a wide smile. “Yay! That’s great.”

Tobin studied Alex for a moment. “You don’t know what I’m referring to, do you.” When Alex gave an apologetic smile, the French woman chuckled softly, shaking her head. “France is playing the US.”

It took a moment, but the words processed in Alex’s head and the realization hit her face. “Oh! Right! I completely forgot,” she ran her hand through her hair.

The stress of not scoring was causing her to forget about a few things. Oh my god, what if she didn’t get called into camp because of her club performance? Yeah sure, she’s Alex Morgan, but crazier things have happened. Even with her name, she still had to compete for a spot on the team, and her performance hadn’t been promising in the past games. She needs to score and she needs to score tomorrow if she wants to show Jill that she still had what it took. She needed to prove she still had a spark in her that could score goals.

Noticing Alex’s expression shift and the stress lines crease her face, Tobin immediately sat down next to her. “What’s wrong? Is it the call up? You know I only got the call now because almost all of my teammates are in France, so they need to know beforehand.”

The striker’s blue eyes fell to her lap as she shook her head. “It’s not - well yes, it is the roster.” Her hands clamped together in her lap as she willed herself to stop thinking. It didn’t work - at least until Tobin’s hand some out found itself place above Alex’s. That definitely did the trick. Her eyes slowly lifted their gaze to find Tobin’s concerned and confused eyes on her.

“I haven’t scored since our first game,” she reminded the midfielder quietly.

This only confused Tobin more as she opened her mouth to ask, “What does that have to do with…” she trailed off, her expression softening when it made sense. “Alex, you’re getting called into camp. Your goals aren’t the only good thing about you on the field.”

Alex chewed her lip, processing Tobin’s words. It was difficult with heat emanating from the bottom of Tobin’s hand still resting on top of hers, but she managed to understand. “I hope you’re right.”

“You work harder than almost anyone on this team,” Tobin added, her hand now wrapping around Alex’s clenched ones. The midfielder’s other hand placed itself on Alex’s knee lightly. “I know you, and I know you’re going to do anything it takes to make yourself the best. So stop worrying and let it happen. I know it will.”

The younger one’s head spun. The skin under Tobin’s touch were warm and buzzing, but despite how nervous it made her, Alex liked it. Yet it was the words that were still left in the air that made Alex’s worry ease away. Tobin always had that effect on her. Just being in the girl’s presence was enough to begin to calm her down. The girl wasn’t always much of a talker, and often times she figured silence would do better than speaking, but when she did speak at times like this they were the words Alex needed to hear the most.

Tobin gave her knee a gentle squeeze and offered an encouraging smile. “You’re Alex Morgan, and you’re going to do amazing things.”

The words echoed in Alex’s ears. She’d heard it so often so long ago that the words almost seemed like a distant memory. In her mind, she could see college versions of her and Tobin; Alex typically nervous or upset and Tobin just as calm and tranquil as she was now. It was almost like their little mantra for Alex when she didn’t think she could do something, and it did the trick every single time. Alex didn’t bother to hide the dumb smile on her face that appeared seconds later.

Tobin’s smile widened at the smile. “It still works.”

“It always has,” the striker pointed out, her whole body seemingly buzzing with an anxious vibe.

“Good,” the midfielder said, her lips brushing Alex’s temple, sending a shiver down the younger girl’s smile. “Now let’s watch one of those dumb movies you like before bed,” she suggested as she got up, her hands leaving Alex’s burning skin to grab the remote for their TV. The places Tobin’s hands once were now were cold and ached to feel Tobin’s touch again.

“They’re not dumb!” Alex argued, but a smile resonated on her face. “You love them. I know you do.”

Tobin laughed, returning to the bed with the remote in her hands. “Shut up, Morgan.” She hopped onto the left side of Alex’s bed with back comfortably against the pillow, then looked at Alex expectantly. “Well come on. You can’t watch a movie comfortably sitting on the edge of the bed, silly.”

\--

The obnoxious sound of someone’s alarm went off at 7:30, but it continued on undisturbed for a solid three minutes until it automatically went to snooze. Alex didn’t want to make any effort to do anything, finding her position on the bed pretty comfortable. For some reason, she felt warmer and more comfortable than usual. Then she realized that there was something behind her. Freezing in her position, Alex’s eyes flew open as she tried to make sense of her surroundings. She was in her bed, facing the blank wall. Sheets were wrapped around her, and there was a hovering warmth coming from behind. Her arm stretched and when they brushed across another slightly hard structure, she almost jumped. The striker’s eyes widened, and it took a moment to realize that it wasn’t someone trying to kidnap her. It was an arm loosely slung around her waist.

Tobin.

Alex blinked at the realization, her face suddenly heating up. She was grateful that she wasn’t facing Tobin for her to witness it. Then again, as she listened closely, she could hear Tobin’s faint snores and held in a chuckle. The midfielder had always been a heavy sleeper. Her urge to laugh at the situation she found herself in suddenly disappeared when it all really hit her.

Why was Tobin Heath in her bed, practically holding her?

Both their clothes were on, so that was a good sign. No sleeping together. Not that Alex would’ve - she needed to focus. The last thing she could remember was getting cold so she slid under the covers as the continued to watch the movie, head resting on Tobin’s shoulder. The difficulty of remaining cool and collected while Tobin sat next to her throughout the whole movie, absentmindedly drawing her patterns on the striker’s knee with the pads of her fingers was something even Alex could attest to. Somehow, they both must have fallen asleep before the movie ended because when Alex crained her neck to check, the TV was still on, with an add about the hotel’s pay-per-view movies broadcasted on the screen.

The younger woman rested her head back in its original position and let out a soft sigh. Tobin showed no signs of budging, and Alex couldn’t figure out what to even make of the situation. Breakfast was in half an hour though, and if Alex calculated correctly, she had five minutes before the alarm went off again. She tried to scoot out from under Tobin’s arm the best she could, but Tobin sleeping was deadweight Alex couldn’t move out of. She must have done some serious weight lifting in France. Just went she thought she could escape, Tobin gently dragged her back, causing Alex to panic and make a muffled groan.

“Mmm,” Tobin murmured, and nuzzled her nose into Alex’s neck.

The gesture sent shivers down Alex’s spine, but just as soon as she found herself leaning towards the touch and hastily jerked herself out of the position, sending her tumbling off the bed with a loud, high-pitched yelp.

“Shit,” she hissed, slowly propping herself up.

Tobin finally stirred, eyes blinking ever so slowly. She peered over the bed with squinted eyes at Alex. “You okay?”

“Uh yeah,” the striker nodded, her cheeks undoubtedly burning. “Just um, didn’t realize where I was going.”

The midfielder let out a soft, tired chuckle with a shake of her head. “Nice going, Morgan. In a hurry to get to breakfast now, are we?”

Alex let out an awkward, almost forced, laugh and rubbed the back of her neck as she stood. “Yeah, that’s it. I call bathroom first!” she shouted quickly before sprinting to the other side of the room and locking the door behind her.  
“Oh my god,” she groaned to herself.

\--

“Mana, hey!”

“Ow, Alex!” Mana cried as Alex roughly grabbed her wrist and forced her into the seat next to her. “What are you doing?” Before Alex could answer the midfielder groaned, looking out the window to see Tobin waiting to enter the bus. “This is stupid!”

“What?” Alex feigned innocence, batting her eyes.

Of course it was Mana that Alex went running to after breakfast to recount what had happened. The younger woman looked at her for a long moment before cracking a slightly inappropriate joke to which Alex gave her a hard smack of the shoulder. Somehow, she felt comfortable confiding in Mana about everything going on, and Mana seemed to take any new information Alex threw at her with ease. Alex liked that a lotl

Mana was unimpressed and frowned in return. “Stop avoiding her. Tobin’s pretty oblivious sometimes, but when she sees you aren’t waiting for her to slide into the seat next to you she’ll definitely notice something is wrong. Suck it up, it’s not like you had sex.”

“SHHHH!” Alex practically screeched, squeezing Mana’s wrist. “Shut up!”

The hawaiian wiggled her wrist out of the striker’s grip. “Okay sorry. Everything’s fine. You two just fell asleep watching a movie.” She stood, looking down at Alex. “It’s fine. You’re friends.” With that, she made her way into the seat next to Stephanie Catley.

“Friends who were practically cuddling this morning!!!!!!” Alex wanted to scream. She pouted, crossing her arms and facing the back of the chair in front of her until she felt Tobin plop into the seat next to her.

“What’s with the pouty face?”

Alex turned, pointing to Mana. “She sucks.”

Tobin laughed, rolling her eyes before a knowing smile appeared on her face. “We can get her back for whatever she did.”

It was always so easy to fall back into normal when it came to Tobin.

\--

“Kelley!” Alex yelled after the game, maneuvering around teammates to make her way to the freckled woman.

Her legs were tired and sweat lined...everywhere, but she couldn’t wipe the huge smile off her face. She had finally broken her scoring drought with two goals tonight, giving the team a slim 2-1 victory. In the tunnel as they all lined up, Tobin pulled Alex into a quick, firm hug as her lips brushed against her ear.

“You’re Alex Morgan. Tonight is the night you score.”

The sound of Tobin’s voice and her breath on her ear was enough to get Alex buzzing all over. But something in Tobin’s words stuck with her; and she played like she was on fire. The whole game consisted of Alex finding open spaces and leading the attack. Nothing could’ve prepared Sky Blue for Alex Morgan.

“Alex! Hey!” Kelley replied, reaching out and pulling her into a hug. “It’s so good to see you.”

“I’ve missed you so much.”

Kelley pulled away, an impressed expression dawning her features. “Me too. Damn girl, what was that tonight?”

The striker laughed, a sheepish smile on her face as she offered a small shrug. “I’m not sure.”

“It was obviously me,” a voice behind Alex said.

Alex turned, seeing a smug Tobin behind her. “Oh yes,” she said sarcastically with a roll of her eyes. “The great Tobin Heath has blessed me with her skill.”

Tobin chuckled, giving her a wink. “You know it, Lex.”

Kelley looked from Alex to Tobin, giving Alex a suggestive look that the striker glared at her for. The freckled woman laughed, opening up her arms. “Come here you loser.”

Tobin grinned, making her way over and pulling Kelley into a tight hug. “Hi Kel.”

Over Tobin’s shoulder, Kelley was still making suggestive faces at Alex.

“Cute,” Kelley mouthed, smirking.

Alex rolled her eyes in response.

 


	6. Five: Going with the Flow

Spring was slowly fading as summer made itself known. The smell of sunscreen filled the locker room every day of training and sometimes on game days. Some people - like Tobin - chose to ignore the common use of sunscreen and instead leave her skin exposed to the sun, becoming either red like a lobster or simply tanned. Alex had seemingly found her rhythm again, being able to find the back of the net more often than not. Everything was falling into place for her. Things were going well with her club - they were ranked number two in the league and Alex was a big contribution - and her national team; she had (not surprisingly to anyone else but Alex, of course) gotten the nod for the France matches.

“I told you,” Tobin told her with her stupid smug smile that somehow made Alex fight an oncoming grin. “There was never a doubt in my mind.”

Instead, the striker simply rolled her eyes. “Yeah whatever,” she muttered before lightly nudging Tobin.

The older girl laughed, grabbing Alex’s arm and pulling her close for a hug. “Dinner’s on me tonight. Tell Mana and Allie. We’re celebrating.”

Things were even going really well between her and Tobin - like, extremely well. So well as in they’d go out weekly and frequently enough for Allie to pick up on the course of events. Being one of Alex’s closest friends on the team, she felt the right to know what was happening. It was one of those rare evenings Alex wasn’t running around Rose City with Tobin when the question casually came about.

“So,” Allie started, swallowing a spoonful of her dinner as she and Alex watched a re-run of Scandal. “Are you and Tobin dating?”

Alex almost spit out her own spoonful. “What?”

There were some things she just didn’t tell anyone. Her adventures with Tobin tended to be one of them - unless Mana pushed the subject to the point Alex could no longer ignore her. There wasn’t really much to tell. They went out to see movies, run together, eat together - just typical things friends did. It wasn’t like they were holding hands and making out at any point, but Alex wouldn’t have minded adding that in; not that she’d admit it out loud.

“I’m pretty sure you’re out with her more than you’re home,” the blonde pointed out. “When we’re not training, you’re somewhere with Frenchy. Then when you come back, you have this dumbstruck look on your face as if you’re on cloud nine.”

The striker opened her mouth to defend her actions, but nothing came out once she realized what her friend said was indeed true. It seemed like it had been the longest since she spent with Allie in the comfort of their apartment or shopping for hours on end or just messing around. Actually, the only time she and Allie were ever alone were before they went to bed and their mornings before trainings. Everything else was with others on the team, or a trio of Allie, Alex and Tobin, and sometimes even Mana tagged along making it a happy group of four.

The older woman noticed the expression on her friend’s face and immediately added, “Not that it’s a bad thing. Tobin’s a great person.”

“Yeah,” Alex nodded dreamily, a faint smile ghosting her lips at the mere thought of the international. “She really is.”

“I’m going to take your dumb face right now as a yes to dating Tobin?”

The hint of a smile on the striker’s face disappeared, her teeth biting on to her bottom lip. “Not really,” she mumbled, facing away from her friend and letting her damp hair cover the side of her face.

“Talk to me,” the blonde immediately suggested, putting her plate down on the coffee table in front of them.

Alex chewed lightly on her bottom lip, contemplating how much she should tell her friend. She trusted Allie with a lot, but there were some things she didn’t feel as if she could share with her. It wasn’t that she thought Allie couldn’t keep a secret; it was simply just that she had to pick and choose what to tell the right people. “We’re definitely _something_ ,” she stated quietly. “I just don’t know what, and by the looks of it she doesn’t want to know what.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s the way Tobin operates,” the younger woman sighed, running a hand through her hair. “She doesn’t really like to define anything, or have detailed, clear explanations. She just goes with the flow of things. Her motto’s kind of like ‘whatever happens happens.’” Letting out a frustrating groan, she added, “It’s the most infuriating thing, ever.”

Allie laughed softly at Alex’s annoyance at their teammate, but rested a hand gently on the striker’s arm. “You have two options: talk to her about it and figure out where you are, or you can try ‘going with the flow.’ Maybe it’ll work out better for you.”

“Which one’s the better option?”

The question caused the midfielder to laugh and pat Alex’s arm gently. “That’s up to you. Can’t do everything for you, Al.”

Alex rolled her eyes, narrowing her eyes at Allie. “You’re annoying.”

“I think the term you’re looking for is helpful,” Allie grinned, reaching over and picking up her plate from the coffee table, continuing to finish her meal.

The striker turned her eyes back to the TV, but she didn’t understand anything happening. Her conversation with Allie was really making her think about her and Tobin. There wasn’t any doubt in Alex’s mind that there was something going on. Lingering touches and close proximities weren’t part of being good friends. There were times she’d stare at Tobin when she wasn’t looking, but she knew Tobin would be doing the exact same thing when the midfielder thought she wasn’t paying attention. She could feel it in the way her skin grew hot and how quickly she’d grow conscious of what she was doing; Tobin could watch her for minutes on end and Alex wouldn’t say a damn thing because she was afraid she’d freak Tobin out.

There were times when Tobin would slide her arm around Alex so casually no one even noticed anything different except Alex. Her skin burned at the contact, and it was difficult not lean in towards Tobin; she wanted more contact with the woman, more of her touch and scent. Tobin Heath intoxicated Alex in every way imaginable, and Alex knew that hadn’t changed once bit since college. She just didn’t know if Tobin still felt anything marginally close to that about her.

\--

“Falling asleep on a short flight, are we Morgan?” Tobin asked, quirking her eyebrow with an amused expression.

Alex’s eyes fluttered opened, immediately glaring at the girl in the seat next to her. “If I do recall, someone kept me up all night with her stupid text messages.”

The older woman snorted with a roll of her eyes. “I didn’t force you to reply, dork.”

Seemingly, the only appropriate response in Alex’s position was to glare harder, and so she did. Tobin had a point to what she was saying, but younger woman was already fully aware of it. She knew she should have put down the phone and gone to bed, but she didn’t. Texting Tobin seemed so much more appealing, especially when every message she received made her smile no matter what it was. She was just glad her and Allie didn’t share a room because Alex was certain the blonde midfielder would have gone mad with beeping going off every minute or so and possibly chuck the phone out the window once she’d had enough of the noise.

After her conversation with Allie, she had made the decision to confront Tobin about the whole situation. It shouldn’t have been difficult to do; Alex was always pretty verbal and open when it came to their relationship back in college. All she had to do was ask Tobin what was going on between them and if it should continue, except the idea of it made her nervous. This wasn’t college; it was years since then, and it was no denying the two of them had matured and changed over time. Yet somehow they still found their way back to each other, and Alex took it as a sign that it must all mean something. Tobin couldn’t just show up to Portland without God or some higher power telling them that she was there for a few reasons besides to play in the states.

She’d rehearsed what she had to say in front of her mirror, mumbling them under her breath when Allie was home. Alex knew exactly what she wanted to say and how she wanted the situation to go, but there was still that slight doubt that Tobin would deny her. It wasn’t like Alex would have purposely given a reason for her to do so, but with Tobin being in France and becoming a sort of “new” person, maybe that meant she didn’t want Alex in the way she used to. Maybe it was just all fun and games; Tobin didn’t live here, and if her contract was up and she wanted to go back to France, it would be so easy to leave Alex in the dust. North Carolina Tobin wouldn’t have even dreamed of doing that, but this French Tobin that Alex had come to know over the past few months seems capable of it.

Tobin had taken her to Voodoo Doughnut after one of their morning sessions, and as she stuffed half of her fruit loop covered doughnut in her mouth - of course dropping crumbs all over her seat - while she drove Alex decided she wanted to figure everything out that morning. She watched her teammate for a moment, noticing the crumbs that fell to the corners of Tobin’s mouth as she chewed and the way her eyebrow slightly furrowed as she turned the steering wheel with one hand - half of her donut in the other. Everything for Tobin seemed so simple, and Alex liked simple. She liked the idea of it a lot.

“What?” Tobin asked through crumbs of fruit loops and donut. She snuck a glance at Alex, quirking her eyebrows in question. “Is there something on my face?” she added teasingly, a hint of a smile on her lips.

It made Alex giggle, feeling like a dumb kid madly in love with her best friend. In a sense, she still was that dumb kid. “Just a little,” she admitted, grinning. “Maybe a crumb here or there.”

The midfielder flashed her the famous megawatt grin that could make anyone smile without even trying. Everything was coming so easy when she was with Tobin. Playing was easy with her, laughing was easy with her - life in general was easy with her. The smile was enough for Alex. If Tobin wanted to go with the flow, so would she. It seemed to be working out well for the French soccer player, might as well give it a try. They’d figured it all out eventually; answers weren’t needed immediately.

As if she knew, Tobin confirmed Alex’s thoughts with her now doughnut-less hand resting on top of the forward’s.

“Alex, you good there?”

The forward blinked, seeing Tobin’s hand wave in front of her eyes. She’d been so deep in her thoughts that she totally missed the fact that they’d landed. She looked around to see everyone else getting up and gathering their carry ons before they exited the plane. Damn, she was really out of it for awhile.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she nodded, taking her carry on that Tobin held out for her. “I just didn’t realize we were already here.”

The midfielder chuckled softly, shaking her head. “Oh Lex,” she tsked.

Her free hand and placing it on the small of Alex back. Alex’s skin burned at the touch, and she turned away so Tobin wouldn’t see the forward bite her lip. They exited into the aisle, Tobin guiding Alex, hand never faltering. The younger woman didn’t face Tobin at all, afraid her face would completely give her away. It wasn’t until they found themselves in the bustling airport with people going in completely different directions that Alex turned, her back suddenly colder without Tobin supporting it.

“Here we are,” she said, not really knowing what else to say. She had already spotted her teammates that flew in from Seattle heading off towards the exit. They must already have a cab waiting and Alex knew she should go if she wanted to catch up.

“Here we are,” Tobin repeated, with a soft smile. “I think I see one of the team staff members waiting for me.”

“And I just saw my teammates probably walking towards a cab.”

A cheeky smile formed on Tobin’s lips as she said, “Don’t miss me too much these next few days.”

“Oh please,” Alex laughed, throwing her head back. “I’ll be too focused on kicking your ass this next week and a half.”

“Don’t speak too soon,” the midfielder challenged, a slight smirk on her lips. “Wouldn’t want you to be bitter the whole plane ride back to Portland.”

“We’ll see,” Alex shot back, her competitive side coming out to play.

Tobin beamed. She loved Alex’s competitive side; it just made her that much more attractive. “I don’t want you to miss that cab,” she expressed, dropping her bag and opening her arms. “I’ll see you on the field, American.”

The forward dropped her bag as well, stepping forward to wrap herself up in Tobin. “See you Frenchy.”

Tobin hovered next to Alex’s temple, as if she was hesitating. Alex held her breath, wondering what was going on in the midfielder’s mind. If she was planning on doing something, she didn’t. Instead, she pulled away and Alex was tempted to pull her back around herself again. “Be safe.”

“You too,” Alex nodded, picking up her bag and walking off rather quickly in order to find her teammates. She didn’t need to look back to know Tobin was still watching her.

\--

Alex lay flat on her back, staring up at the dark ceiling. She’d been listening to her roommate’s steady breathing for the past half hour. It wasn’t as if she wasn’t tired; the forward was exhausted. They had a game in two days and she knew she was battling for a starting spot every single time. Maybe sometimes she pushed herself too hard at trainings, but she felt like she still had a point to prove. After the struggle she’d found herself in during the season, she worked in overdrive. There was only one person that could make it all fun and games for her: Tobin.

She thought about Tobin and how she was doing with her team. Just as Alex’s team was leaving, the French had arrived and Alex got a glimpse of Tobin before she was being pulled to the bus by Sydney. Her hair was the low ponytail she often had it in, and she wore one of her team’s training shirts. It was strange not seeing the midfielder in the typical Rose City red, but the French kits sculpted her body and did justice to her arm muscles. She suddenly threw her head back as her infectious laugh filled the air. Another softer laugh joined in with hers and when Alex turned her head slightly, she saw a shorter woman sitting next to the midfielder. The woman was pretty; she had brown hair and her features crinkled in an adorable way as she laughed with Tobin. To balance herself, she clutched onto Tobin’s arm, leaning into her and resting her head on her shoulder. Tobin made no signs of wanting to move away. Alex’s own shoulders drooped, but she was quickly pulled away. She didn’t miss the fact Kelley has witnessed the entire thing as well.

She’d heard of the woman with Tobin. Her name was Laure Bolleau and she was definitely an incredible defender that had denied Alex a few times. Now Alex couldn’t erase that image of her arm around Tobin. It was only a brief moment that Alex had caught, but she wasn’t sure what to make of it. Tobin appeared to be into Alex, right? She held her hand, put her arm around her and practically did everything but kiss her. She shouldn’t even be worried about Laure.

This caused her to toss and turn for another hour, wondering why it was bothering her so much. Amy seemed undisturbed next to her, still soundly sleeping. It wasn’t until Alex’s phone lit up next to her that she finally distracted herself with something. She read the message once. Twice. A few moments later, she typed a reply and slid out of bed. Alex looked back to make sure Amy was still sleeping then made her exit. There was a rush of liveliness back in her, even with her aching muscles.

“What took you so long, Morgan?”

Alex turned her head as the elevator doors closed behind her. She rolled her eyes when she caught sight of Tobin sitting so casually in the lobby with a stupid smirk on her face. “Some of us actually try at training, you know.”

The midfielder laughed, shaking her head. “I almost forgot Americans focus a lot of physical fitness. Now come on, you had me waiting for awhile.”

“How did you even get away with coming here?” the younger woman questioned.

A smile graced Tobin’s lips as she gave her a mysterious wink. “Don’t worry about it.”

She tugged on Alex’s arm, leading her out of the hotel. The younger woman had no clue where they were going, but she let Tobin lead her anyway. They fell in step as Tobin slowed her paced to match the other’s, both letting the sound of their shoes hitting the pavement fill the air. It was a warm night and the air smelled faintly of coffee shops and restaurants as they all were coming to a close for the night. Alex tried really hard not to side eye Tobin’s chiseled arm next to hers.

“Where are we going?” she finally asked.

A mysterious glint appeared in Tobin’s eyes at the question. “Here.”

Alex tore her eyes away from the French player to find a park in front of them. There was a trail that ran along the edge, almost as if it was outlining the area. Trees were planted around the area, and there was a kids’ playground amongst it all.

“Wow,” the striker breathed out slowly, admiring the simplicity yet familiarity of the park. It was like a memory in the back of her mind. There was just something about the place that felt like home to her. Of course, she’d never been in this part of the United States very often; she was sure she wouldn’t have overlooked this place.

After enjoying the look that took over Alex’s features, Tobin finally spoke up. “I saw this the other day on the way back from training. It reminded me of Portland...and you. Like that park you took me to.” Her cheeks seemed to grow pink as her eyes averted Alex’s and instead fixated themselves on the swing in the distance while rubbing the back of her neck.

Alex bit her lip to stop the oncoming smile from spreading at all. “I love this place already.”

The famous megawatt grin made an appearance and Alex couldn’t help but return the favor.

“I bet I can swing higher than you can.”

“Always so competitive,” Tobin groaned, but laughed and ran to the swings with her anyway.

\--

2:15 AM.

Alex didn’t mean to spend almost two hours with Tobin. The time just happened to slip away from them. One moment they were laughing and trying to swing higher than the other, the next they were sitting on a tree branch talking about anything and everything. The striker had missed it so much over the past few days; she missed Tobin. She missed what it felt like to be with her. It was more than just the sneaky glances and endless smiles. It was the easiness of life; the worries Alex had didn’t even occur to her. It was like she and Tobin were the only people and all troubles would be fixed one way or another at a later time. She wanted more and more of Tobin.

Then Tobin had her pressed up against the tree.

Tobin had talked her into seeing who could run faster (the answer was obviously Alex) and thought it’d be funny to try to tickle Alex as soon as she caught up to her. The midfielder lurched for Alex, trying to squeeze her sides. Alex let out a screech, trying to escape, but her only option was to run into the tree. Quickly, she skidded to a stop, her hands pushing against the bark to avoid the collision. Tobin came crashing in behind her, pushing them both together against the tree.

“Shit,” the international player laughed, easing back just a little.

Alex took a moment, trying to catch her breath but only ended up laughing. Slowly, she turned to face her. “Are you trying to take me out before the game.”

“It wouldn’t hurt,” she replied with a smirk.

The younger woman rolled her eyes with a scoff escaping her lips. “Asshole.”

Tobin’s hands pressed against the bark on either side of Alex’s head, steadying herself as she tried to catch her breath. They were so close that Alex could feel every inhale and exhale Tobin took. She swallowed the lump in her throat and bit her bottom lip as she looked down. Leaning in a little would mean her lips would meet Tobin’s. Looking up again, she realized the older woman was looking at her. Tobin’s head was slightly tilted and she seemed...entranced.

“Why do you always look at me like that?” Alex breathed out quietly.

“Like what?”

“You know what.”

Tobin looked away briefly, then returned her eyes on the questioning blue gaze. “Because I’m so tempted...”

“To what?” Alex asked urgently, needing to hear Tobin say it. She needed to know it wasn’t just some crazy figment of her imagination.

The midfielder looked at her for a long moment. There was something on the tip of her tongue; Alex knew it, but instead of speaking Tobin stepped away from the tree and Alex, her arms falling to her sides.

“Nevermind,” she mumbled, beginning to walk away.

“No, don’t you ‘nevermind’ me Tobin,” Alex said, pushing herself off the tree.

“We need to get back to our hotels, Alex,” she continued, ignoring her. “It’s late.”

Alex took the extra step, reaching out and grabbing Tobin’s wrist to turn her around. “Tobin.”

She turned, looking at Alex’s demanding bright eyes. A sigh escaped her lips as she said, “I don’t know if we should, Alex.”

“What?”

Tobin took her hand, intertwining their fingers. Alex’s body buzzed with a feeling that hadn’t been there in forever. “Let’s not talk about this tonight. We have a game.” She tugged the forward along before she added, “I’ll drop you off.”

They didn’t speak on the way back.

 


	7. Six: Injured foreigner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She shouldn’t have been bothered by such an insignificant thing.

“ALEX.”

Thud.

“WAKE.”

Thud.

“UP.”

Thud.

The loud noises caused Alex to squeeze her eyes shut harder before pulling the blankets over her head. She had no idea what time it was and she didn’t plan on finding out any time soon. The sheets and pillows felt too nice to even think about moving away from. Another thud landed on her back before she let out a strangled groan from under the sheets.

“Stop,” she mumbled into the pillow, digging her head deeper into it.

Her roommate scoffed, hitting her again. “Breakfast is in half an hour. Maybe if you weren’t out so late we wouldn’t be in this situation.”

At this, Alex’s eyes shot wide open taking a moment to adjust to the slight darkness the covers provided. “What?”

“You’re not sneaky,” Amy rolled her eyes, dropping the pillow back onto the bed. “I heard you leave and come back.”

The younger striker gulped knowing Amy could very possibly go into full mother mode at any given moment. Slowly, she peeked her head above her sheets, bright blue eyes taking in their surroundings. They finally settled on the short blonde standing next to the bed and giving her a disapproving look. Oops.

“Good morning,” Alex attempted weekly, pulling her covers down a little more to show a small smile.

“Where were you?” Amy asked, ignoring the woman’s greeting. You were gone for almost three hours!”

Alex’s teeth hooked onto her bottom lip, chewing pensively. She was caught between telling the truth and brushing it off as a “nightly walk,” but she wasn’t even sure how she would sell the second option. Amy used to be good friends with Tobin. They played youth national teams together, and so she’d known of Tobin’s relationship with Alex. They’d never actually spoken about it, but Amy still knew.

“I was out,” she finally piped up, still covering her body with the sheets of her bed. It was too comfortable of a position to move from, as well as protection from more pillow attacks from a very strong Amy Rodriguez.

The blonde quirked an eyebrow, narrowing her eyes at the brunette. “Why were you out so late, Alex? You never go out that late. God, no one goes out that late! Especially when we’re in camp!”

Alex winced at the older woman’s yelling. Amy did indeed have a point. Of course, Alex had thought Amy was deep into her sleep when she left and when she returned, but that was not the case. “Um, I was...with someone…” she trailed off, knowing Amy could finish the rest of what she wanted to say.

It couldn’t have been too hard. Everyone knew Alex and Tobin were really good friends again. It was as simple as going to Alex’s social media and looking at just how many posts involved Tobin and their crazy Portland stories. Alex just didn’t want to say it because she didn’t know how Amy would react. They hadn’t become friends until Alex got called up for her first full team camp, and by that time Tobin found a rhythm with the French National Team.

“With..?” Amy let the question linger. Either she was waiting for an answer or trying to find the answer in her head.

When nothing came, Alex was prompted to mumble, “Tobin.”

The blonde’s eyebrows shot up quickly at the sound of the name. Alex watched her features carefully to gauge a reaction. Amy’s brows knitted together for a moment, but realization seemed to hit her as they smoothed over with a soft expression. Okay, so maybe Alex wasn’t in trouble. The older woman’s eyebrow suddenly quirked as a smirk appeared on her lips.

“Sleeping with the enemy, Alex?”

Alex’s cheeks were immediately flushed, forcing her to pull the blankets above the bottom half of her face once again. “Amy!” she shrieked, gripping the sheets tightly.

“Hey!” the older forward laughed, putting her hands up in defense. She couldn’t help but find Alex’s reaction amusing. “No judgement here. You’re both my friends.”

The brunette rolled her eyes. “We’re not sleeping together.”

“Right,” Amy nodded slowly, putting her hands down. “So you left in the middle of the night just to hang out, right?”

“We did!” Alex argued, her cheeks still flushed. She was pouting, her bottom lip sticking out so far Amy had to laugh again.

“Get ready for breakfast Al,” she suggested, patting her on the head. “We have a game tomorrow.” The blonde started to make her way towards the door before adding, “You know, against Tobin”

“Shut up Amy!”

\--

The final beats of the music played out with Alex’s knees pressed against her forehead. Yet again she was in her own little world, visualizing exactly what she wanted to happen on the field in a few minutes. She liked being in control, it meant keeping her grounded and sane. Which is why she’d felt so frenzied lately. Her situation with Tobin was nowhere near her control since she decided to “go with the flow.” Alex felt like she was always two steps behind, not knowing what Tobin meant by what she said or did. Soccer helped her forget. Imagining the great things she wanted to do on the pitch calmed her. Even if Tobin did sneak into her visualizations a few times.

Once she was able to hear the sounds of the locker room, she slowly slid off her headphones. She looked across her locker, but there was no bench with a Tobin hunched over, lips moving ever so slightly as they whispered words of prayer. Alex blinked, staring at the empty space for a long moment. After being in Portland for months with Tobin, she was used to finding Tobin in the locker room as the midfielder’s own game day rituals came to an end. Those soft brown eyes always sealed the deal. They always reassured the forward that she could do it. It’d fill her with a new sense of confidence every single time.

“Alex…” Lauren waved a hand in front of her, trying to bring the girl back into focus.

The forward blinked, sliding her headphones off her head and tossing them on top of her bag. “Huh?” she asked, slowly moving her legs out of the locker.

“Get ready, we’re about to line up in the tunnel,” the older woman explained, giving Alex’s knee a gentle squeeze.

The younger girl nodded, offering a smile as the midfielder got up and began to walk out of the locker room. She leaned down, trying the laces of her cleats once again to make sure they were tight enough before standing up and stretching a little before following the rest of her teammates out as they were being called to line up in the tunnel. She felt a small bump on her shoulder and turned to see Kelley with a smug look on her face.  
“What?” she asked, slightly unamused.

The defender shrugged, trying to fight the smug smile. “Nothing. Just keep your head in the game.”

“Kelley,” she scolded, glaring at the girl and how loud she could be at times.

Kelley only laughed, giving Alex’s arm a light squeeze before skipping off to her place behind Becky in the line. The forward rolled her eyes, finding herself in between Lauren and Megan. She let out a deep breath, rolling back her shoulders back as she focused in on the task at hand. She was here to play the best soccer she could, and that’s exactly what she planned to do.

Typically, she didn’t even look at the other team unless someone called her name and exchanged a quick hug or smile. So it was the same this time. Well, it was until she felt eyes on her from some ways behind. The feeling felt all too familiar; it made her skin grow hot and her teeth take her bottom lip. Alex dared to turn and the face she found comforted her more than she probably wanted to admit. The woman’s expression was calm and collected, a ghost of a smile on her face. It was just like every Thorns game. One last look before the entered the field, except this time number seventeen was on the opposite team.

\--

“Fuck!” Alex hissed when another one of her shots barely missed the goal.

It was the perfect set up, even though Alex didn’t really have time to sit and marvel at the beauty of it. There was a string of one-two touches starting from Becky and going through five other players before young Morgan Brian sent a ball through to Alex. The forward couldn’t have asked for a better ball. All she had to do was push it in front of her and shoot, but even then her shot was slightly off. Out of the three shots she’d had all game, only one had been on target. The other one prior to her latest attempt had sailed way past the upper left corner of the goal. She was frustrated to say the least.

“Almost,” she heard the newly subbed on Amy say as she jogged away.

Alex offered a small nod and walked towards the closest defender to her. There were fifteen minutes left and the score still held 0-0. There were chances, there were corners and there was even a penalty awarded (in which Alex thought honestly Lauren didn’t foul the girl in the box - it was just outside; the girl fell in because she knew how to flop), but somehow they still remained scoreless.

She watched as France’s keeper sent the ball long ways, almost past the center circle and Alex began to jog back that way. It fell to a French player’s feet and immediately Morgan Brian was on them, trying to steal the ball back for her team. She wasn’t quick enough as the player switched the ball to the other side, where a wide open defender awaited. Alex didn’t register any opponent’s face or name. If they weren’t in a white jersey, Alex didn’t care. The player began to rapidly dribble the ball down the the line, making Alex begin to sprint to help her teammates defend. The french player was about to send the ball into the box, but Carli somehow caught up with her, going in to stop the ball from leaving the ground. Instead, she got the player’s foot.

“Merde!” a voice cursed moments later. She was curled up on the ground, her hand reaching back to hold on to her newly injured foot. Her forehead was pressed into the grass as her jaw clenched.

One of the players on the field - Alex couldn’t tell which one or which team - kicked the ball out of bounds, stopping whatever play was happening. The forward turned back to the played crouched on the field to find defender Laure Boulleau being the one in pain. Moments later, a tanned and lanky French player jogged over to her side, crouching down and conversing with Laure. The sound from her mouth was so fluid that it troubled Alex for a moment when she recognized the voice. Blinking, she realized the player’s back dawned the number seventeen.

Oh yeah, Tobin’s in this game.

“Alex!” a voice called out.

The striker turned to see Carli motioning for her to walk over, already having Christen and Morgan by her sides. She jogged, over, taking one last look behind her. Tobin’s hand was resting on Laure’s back as she waved over trainers. Quickly shaking her thoughts, Alex joined the other three, half listening to Carli as she explained how they needed to strengthen their attack. She couldn’t help but sneak glances back, watching as Tobin remained by Laure’s side the whole time, gently rubbing the defender’s shoulder the whole time. It bothered her, and she hated the way it bothered her. She shouldn’t have been bothered by such an insignificant thing. Tobin was a good hearted person looking out for a teammate and friend.

“Alex, you hear me?” Carli asked, snapping her attention back to the huddle.

The midfielder gave a slightly frustrated sigh, but repeated herself anyway. “You need to call more for the ball when you have space around you. Somehow you’re ending up out wide and open a lot more than usual, use that.”

The younger woman nodded. “Okay,” she answered.

“Guys, ball’s about to be in play again,” Christen informed them, nodding over to the sideline.

Laure had been taken off the field and France was beginning to reset. They each went their separate ways and the whistle blew, but not before the flashing image of Tobin comforting Laure at such a close proximity crossed Alex’s mind again.

Alex walked towards her teammates, fumbling with the hem of her practice bib. She had been subbed out the last ten minutes of the game, but not without getting on board with an assist to young Morgan Brian. She reached the midfielder now, pulling her into a sweaty hug.

“Nice goal today,” she said as the pulled away.

Morgan’s bashful wide smile was enough to make Alex smile too. “Thanks for the great set up.”

The striker patted the brunette on the shoulder before walking around and making her rounds to the French players. Her eyes were constantly searching for the player who most likely had taken off both her cleats and socks, and when she found the one she was looking for she slowly strolled over.

“Hey,” a bright smile almost blinded the forward.

The other night’s little adventure came to the forefront of Alex’s mind. She lost her breath for a moment remembering how close their faces had been and if she had leaned in just a little, things could be so very different. Her eyes flickered to Tobin’s lips just for a second.

“Hi,” she replied, snapping herself back into focus. Tobin’s baby hairs that had fallen lose were blowing in five different directions and it was endearing to Alex, really. She loved her baby hairs. “I forgot how much I hate when you pull your dumb soccer tricks on me.”

“You love them in Portland,” the midfielder answered right back, a slight smirk on her lips.

A laugh escaped Alex’s throat as she rolled her eyes. “I love watching you do that to other people,” she corrected. “And now you owe me dinner when we get back.”

The French player quirked an eyebrow. “Why?”

“I won,” the younger woman reminded her with a taunting smile. “Therefore, loser pays for dinner.”

Tobin groaned, a small pout on her lips. “Will you settle for McDonalds?”

It earned her a smack on the arm, but Tobin laughed her infectious laugh anyway. Her laughter faded as she looked behind Alex’s shoulder and furrowed her brows with worry tinting her features. Before Alex could ask what she was looking at, the older woman gently touched her arm.

“I’ll see you tomorrow at the airport,” she said suddenly, eyebrows still knitted together. Worry was lacing her features even more than a moment ago. “Good game Lex.”

“You too,” she replied, but Tobin wasn’t listening to her anymore.

The midfielder walked past her and Alex turned to see her quickly making her way towards the bench. There, Laure was leaning on a trainer with a face full of pain. Tobin immediately went over to her and they exchanged a few quick, fluid words Alex couldn’t hear, but knew she probably wouldn’t have even understood. She watched as the trainer was handed a pair of crutches and helped Laure placed them under her arms, Tobin standing as a steady support. After the trainer walked away, she watched them exchange more words before Laure clutched onto the midfielder’s wrists, saying something before she slid her hands down to Tobin’s, taking them in her own.

“Alex!”

She turned to see Heif making his way over to her with a sharpie extended towards her. The striker offered him a small smile before taking the marker from him. “How long?”

“Ten minutes.”

“Got it,” she nodded before Heif walked off to hand out the rest of the sharpies.The brunette turned around, watching Tobin and Laure slowly make their way into the tunnel, the younger girl entirely too close to Tobin for the forward’s liking. Then, the defender leaned her head on Tobin's shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is such a short chapter, and I apologize. I've been struggling to write this chapter and honestly at this point I just wanted to get it out because everyone kept asking for it. I'm sorry it's not up to par.


End file.
